
Nik Richie: Niki, welcome to TheDirty. I followed your career a bit, you’re quite the LA socialite but please introduce yourself to the Dirty Army. Give us a few highlights of your career.
Niki Ghazian: You guys have an Army? Can I join? Where do I enlist? (Laughs) Um, my career? Well, I’ve been modeling for years now. I’ve been in FHM more than once, and I’m a Lingerie Bowl Player. I just got named in Cultural Mall’s 100 Most Beautiful Worldwide list this year which I’m pretty excited about. Do you want my whole resume? (Laughs)
Nik Richie: So you really are one of LA’s hottest socialites right now…
Niki Ghazian: I really just love the scene out here. I go out and have fun with my friends. I guess you could say that makes me a socialite. It’s not like I’m trying to be this socialite party girl - it just kind of happened. I was raised in LA my entire life! I grew up in Santa Monica so naturally I know everyone on the west side of Los Angeles and because of that everybody kind of knows me. And once my modeling career started taking off it took me to a whole new level. Seriously though, I’ve been partying in Hollywood with a fake ID since I was 17! That means I’ve been going to Area when it was still Prey and even before that when it was The Gate. I know all the owners, promoters and people on the scene. So sure, if that makes me a socialite.
Nik Richie: Does being a socialite automatically mean you sleep with a lot of celebs?
Niki Ghazian: God No! I just got out of a 3-year relationship! The opportunity is there but I’m not really like that. Living in LA you get used to being around famous people. I’m not like most of the girls here with implants who came from the Midwest and are trying to live out “The Hills”. Getting hit on by someone famous doesn’t faze me anymore. Even when I hosted a party for Pure in Vegas, I had Tom Brady was throwing one pass at me after another! (Laughs) He was inviting me to kick it with him! Don’t get me wrong - he’s hot but to be honest, he’s a complete tool! The first thing he says to me is “Hi, I’m Tom”. C’mon buddy, I think we all know who you are.
Nik Richie: Okay, let’s move on to the real reason you’re here. According to our sources at The Beverly Hills Hotel and Villa, you recently slept with a celebrity who was in town for the ESPY’s. Not just any celeb though - the second hottest celebrity! A soccer player? Cristiano Ronaldo?
Niki Ghazian: (Giggles) Yes, I can confirm that.
Nik Richie: Okay, maybe Cristiano Ronaldo ties with me for first. Give me all the Dirty details and don’t waste my time, Niki. I already know more than you think.
Niki Ghazian: Oh yeah? Then I’m sure you know it started Tuesday night where I was doing a red carpet event for Benchwarmer at Kress. After the event, I went over toVilla where my friend Sean promotes. I walked in and the first thing I saw was a table surrounded by gorgeous women. I mean he (Cristiano) doesn’t even need to hire security because at all times he is surrounded by an impermeable threshold of women. It’s impossible to get near him! Our mutual friend told me it was Cristiano Ronaldo’s table and asked me if I wanted to meet him. He led me through the hoard of girls and introduced me in front of all of them. I could feel all the girls eyes burning into my back as Cristiano asked me to sit down and started chatting with me. We hardly had time to get much of a conversation going before the other girls were trying their hardest to get me away from him. I’ve never been one to start a fight and it really wasn’t a huge deal to me so I said good-bye to him and made my way out of the crowd. I just figured i’d leave him to his slew of women that he would probably take home and have some sort of orgy. (Laughs) I walked over to the bar to join my girlfriends when Paris Hilton walked in and made a beeline for Cristiano’s table. I couldn’t believe the way he treated her! He literally turned his back on her. She looked like a moron and looked around to make sure no one saw her get dissed but everyone did! My girlfriend and I laughed a little and went back to our drinks. Then, before long, the club was nearing closing time and Cristiano got up on his crutches to come over to the bar to talk to me! The first thing I asked him was why he asked Paris to kick rocks. He explained to me that he likes curvy girls with tone and that he found Paris “gross”. We talked for a little longer and made arrangements to head elsewhere after.
Nik Richie: Then I have you spotted waiting in the reception area of the lobby of The Beverly Hills Hotel with him arriving shortly thereafter. Did you guys leave Villa separately?
Niki Ghazian: Yes, to avoid paparazzi. There’s always a million cameras outside Villa.
Nik Richie: When you two finally got to his suite, did you immediately ravage him?
Niki Ghazian: Ravage? (Laughs) Let’s just say I wasn’t the aggressor.
Nik Richie: So it was the other way around? Was he wearing a thong?
Niki Ghazian: (Laughs)
Nik Richie: When he wasn’t looking did you steal anything? I would! It’s the Beverly Hills hotel - I’m still trying to get one of their robes!
Niki Ghazian: You’re crazy, Nik!
Nik Richie: Niki, I have to know, aside from being the best soccer player in the world, are there any other hidden talents Ronaldo has?
Niki Ghazian: Nik, he’s gifted in many departments…
Nik Richie: Like the Greg department?
Niki Ghazian: Omg! Did you really just ask me that?
Nik Richie: People want to know these things. I send out pictures of my Master Greg upon request all the time!
Niki Ghazian: I’m sure you Photoshop it to make it look bigger!
Nik Richie: No, I have really small hands so it makes it look huge! Are Cristiano’s hands small?
Niki Ghazian: (Laughs) NO!
Nik Richie: Was he a nice guy? A little conceited maybe?
Niki Ghazian: He’s a nice guy. He’s actually very modest and soft-spoken.
Nik Richie: I’m told that you were seen leaving the Beverly Hills Hotel in the morning wearing the same outfit that you were shot wearing the night before. Can we still call it the “Walk of Shame” when it’s Cristiano Ronaldo’s room you’re leaving?
Niki Ghazian: (Laughs) No, it definitely didn’t feel shameful.
Nik Richie: That’s when the stolen robe would have come in handy!
Niki Ghazian: True, true! (Laughs)
Nik Richie: Did you guys see each other again after that night?
Niki Ghazian: Yes…
Nik Richie: I know you were spotted with him again on Friday. Tell me about that.
Niki Ghazian: Let’s just say I’ve had a great time. He’s a cool guy.
Nik Richie: Fine. Is there anything else you’d like to share with the Dirty Army? Any tips for the girls out there who want to catch someone like Cristiano or myself? Do you want a picture of my Master Greg?
Niki Ghazian: Actually, I have a message for Emporio Armani. They made a HUGE mistake signing David Beckham for their underwear campaign. Cristiano is way hotter, younger and has a better body that’s not littered with tattoos! For a good catch? Do squats and sit-ups. The toothpick bobble head look is not hot! Guys want a girl with a figure.
Nik Richie: Okay, okay…well, thank you so much and congratulations on being the first American girl to conquer Cristiano. Every girl in the world, including Paris Hilton, is jealous of you at this moment. How does it feel?
Niki Ghazian: Fabulous!

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- A Few To Many Before The Game
- Langley's Gayest "Gangster"
- Washed Up Bartender
- Already Doomed
- Sloot Of The Year
- Ugly Sloots
- Miss Anderson The Neanderthal
- Obese
- Caption Of The Day
- Would You? Bar Rats
- SGM Lovers
- Dirty G Still Around?
- The School Oompa Loompa
- NIK WOULD YOU?
- Corporate Reject
- SMASHLEY
- To Greg Or Not To Greg?
- I Worship DW!
- Orange Is Not A Good Look
- DOLPHINS CHEERLEADER
- Kyle Boller Falls For Miss Good Finger's Lies
- Big Time Wanna Be
- Brina Brina Brina
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Caption of the Day
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SUICIDE WATCH!!! PERSON CLOSE TO KANYE WEST FEARS THAT HE MAY HURT HIMSELF!!!
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Douche-Bag-Mafia
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Vuhjynah?
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The BAR Girls In Charlotte Want To Jump You Nik
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Infamous Horse Mouth At ASU
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Gold Teeth, SGM?
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Lamar Odom Dating Khloe Kardashian?
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**Update** Big Brother Bimbo
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Obama Calls Kanye West A Jack Ass
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Great Jam- "Lookin Bro"
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Nickel Is Looking Frail
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Pastor Manning Calls Obama The Devil
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Alpha Phi's Newest!
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The Hills Is A Dk
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Tom Brady Real SGM?
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They Didn't Get the Memo
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9/11 Comedian Chad Brown Loves Celebrity Deaths Too
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**Update** Huge Picture (Pun Intended) For TheDirty.com Of Leper
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9/11 Is A Joke Potluck Party
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Kanye West Apologizes For His VMA Actions
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Dirty Girls Of Stl
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Baby Mama Drama
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Kayne West- He Could've Just Said "I'm A Douche"
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Leper Moving To LA
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DIRTY BRIA
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The Eyelash Monster
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Exclusive Image: Miss California Carrie Prejean Exposed **Update**
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RichieRexic Not Invited to Vegas?
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RichieRexic Looking Creepier Than Ever
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**Flash Back** Sext Messages Gone Wrong
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RR Is A Real Racist
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Rocket Queen
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Lying Dirty Nickel
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RichieRexic Doesn't Need Timberfake
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Warning This Video Is Not Suitable for Children
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Message From RR to Pucker
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**Update** Amber Alert On Leper
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Westwego Tr@mp Exposed
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RichieRexic Has Friends
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Team Pucker
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The RichieRexic Plague
+2 Factor: when a chick gets a boob job it increases her value two points on a ten point scale
+2's: fake boobs
30k Milli: a guy who claims he make millions, but really only make around $30k a year and spends all his money on stuff he can't afford; a poser
6 head (5 head): when a person has a enormous forehead (measured in inches)
Affliction: a brand of clothing worn by losers
Afro-Brow: hairy eyebrows
Air biscuit: fart
Anti-petite: no way near small
Aquaf*gs: underwater f*gs
Babushka: a big giant, Harlem Globetrotter-like afro, that explodes out of the panties of a Crabby Patty when panty security has been breached
Beak: Nose like a large bird
Beat: disgustingly ugly
Bissues: b*tch with issues
Blanimal: A black animal
Blast (putting someone on blast): putting someone in the spotlight and/or exposing them; talking crap about someone
Bucket Seats: nice ass
Butterface: everything looks good, but her face
Cadirack: not easy on the eyes, an eye sore
Caker: chick who wears way too much makeup
Cannibal: a lesbian. Because they eat their own kind
Car-Tastrophe: beat looking people in a car
Ceptor head: looks good except her head
Cheesecake: real fruity guy
Chubble: problems fat people cause.
Combustible Cougar: horny for young men
Combustible face: Hazardous look
Cougar in Training (Baby Cougar): a girl who will grow up to be a Cougar because her mom is one and/or she is starting to look and act like one
Cougars: women who are 40 or older who try to be 20 (by getting plastic surgery, wearing tons of makeup, dressing like they are 20, etc) and usually date or "prey" on younger men
Cougar-Troll: an ugly cougar
Cougarville: place where cougars come from
Cougarwood: place where famous cougars go
Cougrrrr: Very ugly cougar
Count gutula: big stomach
Crabby Patty: p*ssy
Crash test dummy: a dumb friend that you can convince to do anything
Dale Boy (Dales): a guy who claims to be straight but acts like he's gay (or really is just gay)
D-Bagalicious: sensational D-bag
D-Bag: Douche bag; someone who sucks at life; a total jerk
Dirty Army: the group of people who are fans of thedirty.com
Dirty Bird: dirty/sl*tty British chick
Don: a young female gold digger looking for a new wealthy father or sugar daddy
Douchetard: douche + retard
Drag Hag: someone who hangs with drag queens
DSL's: D*ck sucking lips
Dugout Driller: aggressive gay guy
Egg Roll(s): fat Asians
F*gadocious: super gay
F*gtastic: overly gay
F*gtician: professional f*gs
Fake SGM: people who are not in the Scissor Gang Mafia but pretend to be by giving the scissor gang sign in pictures (and NIk will point out the reason why they are not cool enough to be in it)
Fanny Pack's : beat girls that have no appeal
Farm: a person's ass
Fattastrophe: group of very fat people
Fifty cake mistake: big girl who loves cake
Fifty Yarder: only looks good from fifty yards away
File You Away: putting a hot guy/girl (whatever works for ya) in your mental hard drive so you can masturbate to them later
Flesbian: Fake lesbian
Forgy: Short for, "For the gays"
Frat Rat: a girl who loves to hang out with and/or screw guys in fraternities
Freetard: a free retard
Front Grill: teeth
F*ck Trophy: baby/kid..."What bout that chick you met at the club the other night, did you hit that?" "Naw she's got a f*ck trophy."
Fugly: f*cking ugly
FUPA: a fat upper pu**y area. Men can have it too.
Gaysian: a gay Asian.
Gestappo's : those who oppose the dirty army
Gills: side fat; love-handles
Grave Diggaz: dirty nails
Grazer: chick that likes to eat a lot
Green Bay: cellulite; cottage cheese
Gregalicious: Owns a greg
Greg-Juice: self explanatory
Greg: penis; tummy stick
Helmet Special: retard
Himstitute: tranny prostitute
Hoemerican: an American hoe
Horses (or any reference to a horse, stable, the derby, races or horse names): people with huge teeth and gums that resemble those of a horse
Insurgents: non SGM perpetrator/ enemies of the army
Jack Bauer: a person with a large fore head or a twenty forehead
Jay Leno: got a big chin
Kodiak: body of a bear
Lee push up bra: from the makers of lee press on nails
Long Head Clan: horse division ( horse head)
Lotto Baby: unknown father (a lot-of people hit that)
MAC Forcefield: tons and tons of makeup that looks clown-like
Mad Monkey: extremely drunk & out of control
Mick Jagger's : Big lips
Muffin Top: when a person's side or stomach fat bubbles over their waistband because their pants are too tight, forming the shape of a muffin
Multichin: multiple chins
Multi-Gregging: Gang bang on one chick
Nominee: person with no money
Nomo's: a place where no homo's are welcome
Noodles: referring to Asian people or descent
Nostrildahmus: Huge nose pipes
Onion: nice a$$
Oscar Myer: Got a Greg
Pack of franks: fat rolls on a chicks body..."Damn! look at the pack of franks on that chic"
Paki house/hut: liquor store
Patch Adams: balding
Pearl catcher: chicks who get c*mmed on
Pebbles: an attractive, yet underage and overly sexual young girl. (aka jailbait)
Pepperidge Farm: way too old
PGM ("Pinky Gang Mafia"): the rival gang of SGM whose members show their pinky finger when having a picture taken
Pickle Smoocher: rubs the Greg
Pig Fishing: guys who are out to just f*ck anything
Pirate: gay dude. Because they like semen on their poop deck
Poon lagoon: pu**y
Prop 8: gay person who wants to get married
Prosthetic Playa: fake wanna be player
Puffydumbbell: roid user
Purple Crayon: A black man's Gregr
Raisinets: ugly nipples
Red Cup Nation: those of us who agree that only red plastic cups should be used at parties (because all other colors are stupid)
Refund Gap: the huge gap between some women's fake boobs that is so big that they should get their money back from their doctor
Ronald Mcdonalds: High arching eyebrows
RVM: red vest mafia: Valet attendant
Sevenhead: means "Yes I ride the Short Bus!"
Sewerfront: Waterfront in Scottsdale
SGM ("Scissor Gang Mafia"): people who make a scissor/backward peace sign when having their picture taken
She-Boys: Trannys
Shim: a girl who looks like a man
Shimspital: hospital for shims
Shman: female type of man
Shopping Bags: droopy boob job or +2'S
Shotgun: a slutty chick. One cock and she's ready to blow
Shougar: a girl that is a cougar and a shim
Skankaholic: addicted to or being a skank; likes skanky chicks; an alcoholic skank
Ski Jumper: big or long nose
Slant F*cker: guy who only likes f*ckin asian chicks
Slim Slow Diet: a fat person who feels it necessary to show people her body..."Sick, see that fat girl in the bikini? Oh, she is feeling good about herself since she just got on the Slim Slow Diet."
Sloon: a chick that looks like she's mixed with snake lizard and baboon
Slug: Ugly slut
Snicker Licker: White girls who only like black guys
Soldier: a member of the Dirty Army; a fan/supporter of thedirty.com
Sorostitute: a girl in a sorority that is easier than a prostitute
Sphere Job: a boob job
Spongebob: a nasty female that has a crabby patty instead of a vagina
A Stallone: a really ugly Italian chick (or any chick for that matter)
Stay Puff: juice-muscular guy obviously on roids
Stretch Armstrong: face lift too tight
Sugar butt: a gay guy
Summer Teeth: some are here, some are there
Superhighway Gap: boobs miles apart
Synchronized Sucking : what aqua f*gs do
Talons: ugly toes
Tenderfoot: gay or feminine
Thunderstorm: extremely large thighs; thunder thighs
Too Fat Shakur:2-pac fat reference
Top Romin : a person that is broke
Tranimal: animal tranny
Tranny: a girl with so much makeup caked on her face that she looks like a transvestite
Tri-Tip: she can try the tip
Troff Feeder: an obese female
Trout: an older man who dates younger women in trying to be younger or "swim upstream"
Trout Mouth: looks like a fish
Tuna Factory: chick who has nasty lookin p*ssy lips..."That chicks gotta tuna factory goin on down there."
Unbeweavable: lots of weave
WNBA: a tall female who is manly
Would You?: means "would you screw this chick?"
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