Fish Swims Into Boy’s Penis


THE SUN: A FISH swam the wrong way when it leapt upstream into a boy’s PENIS and ended up in his BLADDER. The 2cm daredevil caused all kinds of medical problems when it swam through the teenager’s urethra.

The unfortunate lad was taken to hospital with complaints of pain, dribbling urine and acute urinary retention.  He claimed the fish slipped into his penis while he was cleaning his aquarium at home in India.

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Since I read this story I have been holding my Greg in fear.  WTF?- nik


16 Dirty Comments

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  1. September 18, 2008 at 4:07 pm

    Medium Pimpin says:

    Is this like the new replacement for hampster?

    Reply to Medium Pimpin
  2. September 18, 2008 at 4:17 pm

    Gaetano says:

    Fish are for the gays.

    Reply to Gaetano
  3. September 18, 2008 at 4:20 pm

    hahaha says:

    Was he cleaning his aquarium with his Greg?

    Reply to hahaha
  4. September 18, 2008 at 4:40 pm

    Jimmy Neutron says:

    I have a friend named Dave who had a similar incident, except his involved his rectum and a gerbil. It seems that the gerbil wouldnt’ stop scratching its cage so he taped it up with electrical tape, but somehow the gerbil escaped his page and crawled into his rectum as he slept.

    He had to go to Hoag for class II narcotics and counseling.

    Reply to Jimmy Neutron
  5. September 18, 2008 at 4:56 pm

    Bmore says:

    That little freak put the fish in his wee-wee…seriously who holds a fish while they’re p*ssing. weirdo.

    Reply to Bmore
  6. September 18, 2008 at 4:59 pm

    DrewBreesWay says:

    I would believe it if the fish is The Legendary “Fish Lips” Shea Lynn…

    Reply to DrewBreesWay
  7. September 18, 2008 at 5:41 pm

    Rambo says:

    yea, leaches will do this too if you are in the amazon waters and take a piss. they are attracted to the warmth and will swim right up you greg.

    Reply to Rambo
  8. September 18, 2008 at 6:41 pm

    cougar hunter says:

    why would you hold a fish while taking a piss?

    Reply to cougar hunter
  9. September 18, 2008 at 6:48 pm

    D-rock says:

    Yeah….”cleaning his aquarium”…..kinda like cleaning my gerbil cage and whoops!

    Reply to D-rock
  10. September 18, 2008 at 7:32 pm

    Rocket Queen says:

    what happened to the fish?

    Reply to Rocket Queen
  11. September 18, 2008 at 10:51 pm

    Jack says:

    You moron

    The Sun ?

    they are worse than the national enquirer

    that story is a fake

    Reply to Jack
  12. September 18, 2008 at 10:53 pm

    JON GLUCK says:

    thats it?? ive had bananas in mine.. whats your pont?

    Reply to JON GLUCK
  13. September 19, 2008 at 2:27 am

    burrito bandito says:

    isn’t 2cm like an inch?
    maybe its just me but i think i would notice if a 1″ long fish decided to swim up my gregory.

    Reply to burrito bandito
  14. September 19, 2008 at 4:12 am

    LTS says:

    As this story is posted on an intellectual internet site, certainly it must be true. Yawn.

    Reply to LTS
  15. September 19, 2008 at 6:37 am

    OG Denver says:

    Damn…poor fish!! ;=)

    Reply to OG Denver
  16. September 19, 2008 at 7:23 am

    Bead headed woolly bugger says:

    The candiru, also called the carnero fish, is a tiny parasitic catfish that inhabits the waters of South America. They can reach lengths of 1-2.5 in (2.5-6 cm) with a width of 3.5 mm. Their diminutive size and nearly transparent body makes them very hard to locate (not that you would want to). The candiru has sharp bones with a series of spines located around the head used while feeding.

    HABITAT

    The candiru is found only in the Amazon and Oranoco Rivers of South America. They do not like the sun and tend to burry themselves in the mud and sand of the river bottom underneath logs and rocks.

    FOOD

    The candiru has a voracious appetite for blood and will parasitize fish, mammals, and humans. One scientist, while holding a candiru, accidently let it enter a small cut on his hand. It could be seen writhing under the skin towards the vein.

    To find a fish, the candiru first tastes the water, trying to locate a water stream that is coming from the gills of a fish. Once such a stream is detected, the candiru follows the stream to its new host and inserts itself inside the gill flap. Spines around its head then pierce the scales of the fish and draws blood while anchoring the candiru in place. The candiru then feeds on the blood by using its mouth as a slurping apparatus and while rasping the long teeth on its top jaw.

    When candirus parasitize humans, it is usually only when they are skinny-dipping while urinating in the water. The candiru tastes the urine stream and follows it back to the human. It then swims up the anus and lodges itself somewhere in the urinary tract with its spines. Blood is drawn, and the candiru gorges itself on both the blood and body tissue, its body sometimes expanding due to the amount of blood. This is all said to be very painful for the poor person who has this happen to him or her. Unfortunately, they are almost impossible to remove due to the spines. Amputation of the private areas is the cheapest, and most life-changing, way to remove the fish. Actual surgery is extremely exp

    Reply to Bead headed woolly bugger

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