Posted in Hamptons, Hollywood, The Dirty | August 2nd, 2009
THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey Nik. Have you seen Hef’s new girlfriend Melissa Taylor? Hef refuses to say she is an official girl (my guess is he is embaressed of her) she says she lives in the playmate house, but I hear she lives in room #5 at the mansion.
Why would you want to live at the Mansion unless you hated having sex? Dating Hef is the same thing as taking an act of celibacy.- nik
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CAli.Doll says:
It’s a gold diggers paradise! Posing for the magazine is one thing but sharing spit with Hef and every peroxide chick he has kissed is just gross
to CAli.DollTonyC says:
The bleach blonde stripper look is old. It’s like he’ll let anyone in. As for Crystal…she looks better now that her grill is fixed. She’s still to husky for me though. She looks like she could play for the Bears bro!
to TonyCFrankie D. says:
They are both Fug.
to Frankie D.CestMoi says:
Boy with these shims it’s safe to say Playboy’s standards have officially gone to the dogs – literally.
to CestMoiCome on Hef – you’re slipping!
100% Class says:
Why does she look so familiar?
I hear the actual girlfriends make around 100k a year in those contracts, but they also are with security everytime they leave the mansion. These chicks have to be serious about gold digging to agree to the terms of those contracts…
to 100% ClassRandal P says:
forget about the chicks – Hef look like he is a few days away from death. Mark my words this dude will not see November Rain.
to Randal POneLove ☮ says:
she is beat
to OneLove ☮GND says:
Melissa is not a girlfriend.
to GND=-) says:
sorry to say, she is ugly………..
to =-)what has gotten into hef
these girls he has as am candy are sure not good enough to have on his arm, of course they just want his $$$$, but aleast have some pretty ones
KDIZZLL says:
I heard Hefs a big homo, that might explain the uglies in the mansion lately?
to KDIZZLLColonel Troutman says:
The only things Hef is dating these days are his Depends diapers and spoonfuls of Geritol. I don’t think he could get the old shriveled greg up if he had a crowbar, and I doubt he;s in the mental state anyway. Can’t imagine who will replace him.
to Colonel TroutmanAshamed says:
These girls should be ashamed of themselves. Why sell your soul to be famous? What gold diggers, it should be illegal like street walking is.
to AshamedJohnny Bravo says:
It’s not like they are screwing the old fossil. He’s just paying them to be seen with him.
He’s pretty pathetic.
to Johnny BravoChalupaBreath says:
Recession…
to ChalupaBreathcenyko de mayo says:
all are trailer trash and gold diggers and effing money grubbing who-res!!!
to cenyko de mayoChi-Town Chica says:
Hef looks like’s already dead and being held in place by these fugs — Weekend at Bernie’s style. Poor old guy isn’t even young enough to be considered a trout anymore. Bring back Kendra!
to Chi-Town ChicaColonel Troutman says:
Since all of the white trash gold diggers usually go for the Afro American athletes, it’s refreshing to see a couple warm up to white guys, even if they are geriatric.
to Colonel TroutmanThe Truth From A Real Ex says:
Duno if Melissa is a new gf wouldnt put it past Hef…. The current Fugs, and the old past gf’s allll make the same.. a whoooooping $1000.00 a week. They MUST have sex with him on Fri & Sat nights at the least. They are grounded to the property, and can only leave during the week fro a few hours a day, but MUST be home by dinner, and from Fri night till Sun morn. Now wonder why the terd Twins smoke weed all day, and stay drunk. As 4 Crystal.. LAY OFF THE TWEAK!!! Ask me more questions and I’ll reply… WHY???? Bc I hate, with a passion the 3 new girlfriends. T
to The Truth From A Real ExLeah says:
Are you Hef’s ex?
to LeahYes says:
I have been with Hef. It’s all a real joke!
to YesYes says:
He must have dumped you and now you’re jealous
to YesLol says:
I make well more then $1000.00 a week, and I DON’T have to sleep with an 83 year old man with no condom, so answering your question, NO I’m hardly jealous, and I personally decided not to move in to the Mansion. Nice try though
to LolThe Truth From A Real Ex says:
Duno if Melissa is a new gf wouldnt put it past Hef…. The current Fugs, and the old past gf’s allll make the same.. a whoooooping $1000.00 a week. They MUST have sex with him on Fri & Sat nights at the least. They are grounded to the property, and can only leave during the week fro a few hours a day, but MUST be home by dinner, and from Fri night till Sun morn. Now wonder why the terd Twins smoke weed all day, and stay drunk. As 4 Crystal.. LAY OFF THE TWEAK!!! Ask me more questions and I’ll reply… WHY???? Bc I hate, with a passion the 3 new girlfriends. They are awful souls, and I say that having personally known all 3. I feel bad for Hef
to The Truth From A Real ExYo-Yo Ma says:
These girls are DOWN grades. Where are those 2 skanky twins that beat each other with beer bottles?
to Yo-Yo Macenyko de mayo says:
Colonel T, you are stupid, white women love black sex and your woman too! Stop being jealous you can have them because i love women of color, keep your white women and i have still to find a white woman that isnt trashy, where should i look in the library?
to cenyko de mayosad but true says:
I know Melissa. she used to be a stripper at Main Attraction in Oceanside then at Hustler in Garden Grove. She is a money hungry wh*re that would do anything for attention. Her Ex paid for her boobs then she left him. When she gets what she wants out of Hef she’ll move on to the next sad trout
to sad but truesad but true says:
Oh woops Melissa was a waitress at the Main Attraction not a stripper, my bad. I like to talk a lot of sh*t sometimes and not get the facts straight.
to sad but truesad but true says:
Oh Woops, Melissa was a waitress at the Main Attraction not a stripper, my bad. I should’ve gotten my facts straight.
to sad but truenotafan says:
melissa was a stripper….ive seen her at a club in SD i believe…the hustler one i think. she is old too. since when does hef date girls over thirty?
to notafanmidsummers ruled! says:
I was just a midsummers with all his lovely ladies..the twins were wasted and dry humping any man with silky jammies on..white, black, mexican…old, young, fat, ugly..they had no preference. It was actually disgusting and i found it to be so disrespectful. I was actually in shock..ive been going to mansion parties for the last few years and Holly, Bridget and Kendra never displayed that type of behavior at parites..in fact one of the twins tried to make out with me..she was a hot mess and not in a good way.
to midsummers ruled!onewhoknows says:
I have gotten lap dances from Melissa … won’t say where or when
to onewhoknowscost2much says:
I have as well and I must say my money would have been better spent on a slot machine! BORING, and NOT sexy!!!
to cost2muchlearnthehardway says:
Melissa will tell you whatever you want to hear to get what she wants from you. At least with hef, they use each other!
to learnthehardwayclaudia says:
melissa is sweet as pie and insanely beautiful. hence hef and his girlfriends loving her. anyone who knows her will tell you the same.
(ps ur all f*ckin haters. lol).
to claudialooloo says:
Melissa is a very sweet girl and crystal is as well. The twins act like trailor trash and are the true disgrace. Lay off Crystal and Melissa please.
to looloowhatever says:
she’s gross….this chick I follow on Twitter is what I consider SMOKING HOT…..SexyNatG is her name.
to whateverAnonymous says:
omg cristal isolder than 22 or 23 she looks like she is 28 or even 29 she is definitely not 23 who is she fooling not me 4 sure, old hag
to AnonymousYou kidding? says:
Someone needs to check that dudes pulse.
to You kidding?Princess says:
to the girl who “Claims” to be hef’s ex is full of Sh*t! The amout of money you say you recieved is off by far. If you are his “Ex” theres a reason you are not any longer, look at how you betrayed him by trashing him? Yes hes 83 yrs old but he is a kind, loving, sweet , generous man who genuinley cares for people! He misses Holly and has asked her to come back to him more than once but shes very much over the whole “Play boy” thing. Its sad because he knows he really screwed up by not marrying her when he had the chance. Who ever you are, if youre really his “ex” your an un trustworthy, skanky, mean spirited B*tch to talk about Hef in that way!
to Princess