Douchie Dave
Posted in Sacramento | October 28th, 2009
THE DIRTY ARMY: This is Dave. He claims to have been “Changing Lives Since 1983.” I wanted to submit him to the when he posted that ridiculous photoshopped greg picture on his myspace, but I refrained. Today, however, i just had to when he posted a bulletin to tell girls “to stop making kissy faces in pictures” because it makes them a part of the DB (douche bag) club. Ha! This is coming from the King of Douche Bags! Though I agree about the kissy face, you probably shouldn’t be giving advice when you’re the douchiest of them all. He is 26 without a degree, and works at a supplement store in Granite Bay. He and his 5’5″ friend Justin talk about the “burden” of being so “gorgeous.” Its sad really. Dave could be a good-looking nice guy and could actually do something with his life. Instead, he has ruined his looks by tanning and using steroids and his time obsessed with working out and photoshopping naked pictures of himself. Dave, its not too late for you to become a real person!
Trust me its too late. Makes you wonder how awkward it musta been when he had to sport some wood…definitely FORGY, I wonder if a guy took the picture.
GirlfromtheIE says:
Heeelllloooo look at that chest hair! manscaping at its finest. LMFAO
to GirlfromtheIEyeaa says:
hahahahah that’s f&ckin funny. First thing I noticed too, which is sad considering he has his junk all out there.
to yeaaBeen there says:
Can’t even tell at all that IT’S got a curve to it
to Been thereummm says:
Homo for sure!!! picture was taken by a dude then im sure they showered together…
to ummmMissing facts says:
Justin also does not have a degree.
to Missing factsDouche Bag Deflator says:
WTF is that sh*t on his chest Fungus? Mold? Mildew?
to Douche Bag DeflatorWTF says:
this dude can’t be serious, can someone please slap some sense into this homo?!
to WTFSuperman says:
Damn we got some haters out there! First off i know Dave he’s actually a straight up cool guy, people are gonna hate no matter what tho, if you dont have people hatin then you’re not doing something right, if you have 20 today then you better have 40 by tomorrow, get real people!
to Supermanha fag says:
what a fag, idiot, and DB for sure QUEER
to ha fagDahlia says:
I think it’s a compelling photo; great camera lighting. However, why shave the pits if you are a man? Natural man hair is very sexy.
to DahliaYOUR BOY says:
nappy chest hair.
to YOUR BOYYo says:
Dave is a great guy and one of the nicest guys you’ll meet.. Quit hating!! Justin is also a stand up guy as well!!
to YoLOL says:
for being a some what big dude he isnt packing much heat in the pants. haha Must be the steroids…
to LOLumm says:
wow…wtf is going on with that chest hair???
to ummCome on says:
Dave is a complete sweetheart. So he takes pics of himself… who cares, I bet you all do the same thing. Both he and Justin are amazing people!
to Come onbrigette says:
Why does it have to be considered “gay” when a guy takes care of himself?? Maybe cuz girls are the only ones taking care of themselves these days so a guy like this must be gay right?WRONG!IT actually takes more of a man to have the discipline to look this good,the rest of u are just scrawny, pale, lazy f*cks that girls like me cant stand to look at EVERYWHERE WE GO!!SERIOUSLY..take notes !!!and if you do ever get to his level im sure we’ll start seeing pics of you blasted everywhere too….true story
to brigetteAnonymous says:
You must be 18 or just a total meathead lover… Guys like this disgust me! I dated one and I’m sorry but guys are supposed to have hair and this dbag probably takes longer to get ready them I do… There is nothing wrong with being a guy and taking care of yourself but come on fool… This is too much! Guys that waste their life away in a gym are usually the most insecure of them all…
to AnonymousMissing facts says:
state school doesnt count either!!!!
to Missing factsMissing facts says:
Come on they are amzing people………….. with NO EDUCATION. An AA degree from Sierra College does not count.,, No cheating!!
to Missing factsimgaysowhat says:
i dont care if he is a DB, id let him tickle my chocolate star
to imgaysowhattanya says:
it is possible to be nice and be a douche bag. the argument was never whether or not he was nice
to tanyahaha says:
+1 to that!
to hahahella funny! says:
I +2 that.
to hella funny!EmMa says:
I’v seen him at the gym alot! Keeps to himself it seems, kind of intimidating. But packing none the less <3
to EmMaluvSTRUK says:
“Oscar Myer”
to luvSTRUKYOUR BOY says:
Halfrican nappy chesthair
to YOUR BOYIReallyEnjoyWater says:
I’m glad I’m not the only person who gets an erection when my picture is being taken. I’ve always felt so lonely and weird about it until now.
to IReallyEnjoyWaterAnonymous says:
hunk!!!!! omg
to AnonymousPatiently waiting says:
Dave, your wood= i would.
to Patiently waitingdefamation of character says:
This girl use to work at Scandanavian Designs
to defamation of characterAnonymous says:
haha.. i love how he works at a suppliment store… which means he doesnt make very much money… which means he spent a whole paycheck on those jeans….. REAL COOL BRO. and no there is nothing wrong with being confident and maybe doing a little photoshoot in your bathroom here and there.. but HIRING someone to take a picture of you with a half boner in your undies is not the same thing and is NOT ART for whoever was saying ‘its a compelling photo, great lighting” COME ON NOW. and yes… this is not about him being nice or not.. its about INVITING attention into your life by acting/dressing/photoshopping yourself that way.. gotta expect and accept negative attention to come from it. im sure he is nice.. but he clearly has a side of him thats extremely arrogant as well.
to AnonymousDunzo says:
Guys should never take photos like this!
to DunzoWOAH says:
damn! besides the chest hair…he is sexy as F*CK!
to WOAHThe Dude says:
Glad I’m not the only one who gets boners when taking pictures.
to The DudeAnonymous says:
This photo is onviously photo-shopped. Where are his bottom abs? Usually when someone has the top two they atleast have veins or something towards the bottom. This guys a wanna be. If he’s such a bad ass “bodybuilder” tell him to get on stage.
to AnonymousBeen there 2 says:
This guy is seriously gay. He took more time getting ready than i ever did. He shaves his entire body because he is HAIRY as f*ck! His dick is small and nasty looking, no Joke. Thats why he spends all his time at the gym. He has to have a nice body or not girl would ever want to sleep with that nasty tiny dick! He shoots up with steroids, dont let anyone else tell you different. He thinks he is Gods Gift to Women, FALSE. He also wants to be a cops and he steals and tries to get away with sh*t. He is very cheap and self centered. He is super annoying and get really attached super quick. He has more issues than i can even list. TOTAL TOOL!
to Been there 2been there also! says:
yes.. this is true. took longer than me to get ready… shaved his entire body. insecure and yes gets attached. i don’t remember much about his “bathing suit area.” it was years ago and i was underage and had no size reference to go off of
to been there also!Don't Hate says:
Dave is actually a nice guy. Get to know him before you start talking your sh*t. I was in a Fashion Show with him and he’s not a douche bag or anything else in that category. So get real people.
to Don't HateBeen there 2 says:
GAY
to Been there 2Been there 2 says:
This guy is super gay. I would not be surprised if he came out of the closet. He is the most insecure cocky guy i have even talked to. He is obsessed with himself but also way too concerned about how others view him. He has a very small and unpleasant looking dick, he claims he needs to use Magnum condoms, he is fooling himself. They do not make your dick look bigger douche. Stay clear from him at the gym, he moans and groans like he his getting off ( a true sign of using steroids). Just nasty all around, he shaves his whole body, he is one hairy MF. This guy is a major TOOL! His looks will fool you, but once you get past his looks you know right away he is a TOTAL DOUCHE BAG!
to Been there 2Kyle perkins says:
fuck id suck that dudes cock, haha. come to the gay side! and that chest hair, mmm
to Kyle perkins246 says:
haha
to 246Hahahah says:
Where can i buy thos Jeans i don’t see them on the LV website some one let me know……………..
to HahahahKissed a frog says:
I dated him….stupid stupid stupid!! Not only is he a total DB but has no moral’s, class, or manners. For as much horse steriods as he has taken he should be alot bigger…I can tell you though the steriod’s sure turned him into an ass! Justin is really cool and has a great heart!
to Kissed a frogi says:
nice manscaping. and woah! shocker down there, its bent cause he whacks it too much, hes disgusting and no one cares about your LV jeans
to ihaha I too have been there says:
Dave and I used to “date”…. I got to know him and his steroids…. what a joke. His balls have shrivled up to nothing and my last straw was when he asked me to shave his back. no joke. He needs to find something better to do with his time then inject illegal sh!t
to haha I too have been thereAnonymous says:
You can’t find these on the LV website, because Louis Vuitton never manufactured these. They are counterfeit.
to Anonymous