THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, WTF compels all these sorry idiots like Michael Lohan here to end up committing crimes here in the lovely dirty Trampa? I flip on the news this morning, and here’s this guy trying to fake chest pains to get out of going to jail – that crap don’t fly with Trampa PD. Michael’s presently locked up in the Hillsborough County Jail for some stupid domestic battery charge. I’m sure he will be there a while cause we all know that he’s got no cash for bail. My question is, who’s the dumbass that would choose to get into a “domestic” situation with this washed up ex-junkie piece of trash. Also, WTF is Michael Lohan doing working for “Larasan Pharmaceuticals” as “Director of Marketing”…sounds like a dirty scam right there. Either he’s getting tons of free pills, or it’s some kind of pyramid scheme hawking would-be ED treatments to suckers. Regardless, could you please give him a call and ask him to leave Tampa Bay for good…we’ve got enough trash in St. Pete, we don’t need his shenanigans around here. Thanks, bro. DA Strong!

Sometimes I feel like him and his daughter Lindsay have a mug shot competition going on.- nik