THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I was so excited to see the post about the WSU Sigma Chis, because I cant even convey how much I hate these guys. Your contributor barely scratched the surface about was writing to tell you more about the dirtiest guy skulking around the property- Robert Flatt. He is actually 39, not 40, as the last post says (insert laugh here). You have never met a bigger bunch of pussies than these dudes, and Rob struts around like he is their King. They have this claim that they are “gentlemen” and want to be known as different than other frats, but their backyard features two trees- the puke tree and the piss tree. Nothing like enjoying a nice beer while one sigma chi pukes, and one pees no more than ten feet from you. Dont even get me started about Rob’s wife, Jessica, who will kick hot girls out of parties at their frat saying the girls are “too drunk,” or “sloppy” or, in one case, she accused a girl of stealing things to justify throwing her out! Everyone knows why she wants the hot, drunk girls gone (not like there are a lot of these at sigma chi, ever, lets be honest), because her dirty husband has a taste for the young drunk ones! There are multiple stories around campus about him molesting drunk girls who have had a bit too much at their frat. These two geriatrics run the house as if it is their own personal fiefdom. What I have never been able to understand is why the normal, college aged dudes follow Rob? I mean, I understand you are like only 18-22 ish, but why just do whatever some douchebag says? I have literally heard them say, “Well, if Rob says thats what we should do, then we should!” Rob will lock up their alcohol, that they all chipped in to buy, and dole it out “at his discretion.” Rob was not even honorably discharged from the military- a dirty little secret he is keeping from his brothers. The funniest part is not only is he selling drugs at a house already in trouble for drugs, but he is the formal recruitment chair. Do you know how many pledges they got at formal recruitment? ZERO. Yep, ZERO. They were all waiting outside the CUB for their pledges to come running out to them on bid day… and they just stood there, like the fat girl at the prom, while alllll of the guys ran to other chapters. Once every last new pledge had run past them, they slunk back to their shitty little hovel, di*ks in hand. I included a picture of their frat house, just so you can laugh. It is literally smaller than an average single-family home. Congrats on Press, Nik, keep up the good work, and post this about the DIRTIEST old man in a frat ANYWHERE!

This couple must be the biggest losers in Washington if they’re choosing to spend their free time in a FRAT HOUSE.- nik