THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, Nishil the Manatee is back and has finally run out of money just as I suspected he would about a month ago. He has stopped buying bottles aggressively and has had trouble paying for the few bottles that he does pop on rare occasions. This is the best part, in an attempt to keep his relevance he decided to throw and promote a party in Chicago!! This is the saddest attempt at keeping friends I have ever seen. He got played by Monica, a server at Cuvee, never hooked up with her but did spend his entire 250k bonus he bragged about to everyone with her while blacked out in the corner of the club. You wouldn’t believe how she would open the menu and make him order ridiculous amounts of champagne while he could only slur his speech in the corner and point like a moron without any grip on reality or how much of a mark he was in the city. Monica just decided to whore herself out to get Nishil to deplete his funds as quickly as possible with her at Cuvee, and this idiot fell right into it. Where are you now Monica? Gone with the wind just like the money in Nishil’s wallet. I hope Nishil wears a pair of corduroy pants to his formal event and lights himself on fire by rubbing his fat legs together until they burst into flames. Boating season is over Nishil, now you don’t have to worry about what shirt you will wear on the boat to keep your man boobs less visible when emerging from the water like the brown fat knish pastry that you are.

Sucks when you run out of money.- nik