What Should My Friend Do
THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, usually I’m pretty good with complex issues, this time I need a ruling from a professional. I have a buddy, from grade school, who recently confessed to me that our local parish priest had molested him for years as a child. He said he forgives this guy; it’s in the past, and doesn’t want to prosecute or call any attention to himself or family. He shared the information because he’s contemplating entering the seminary and becoming a priest himself. He asked that I write a letter of personal recommendation for the seminary regarding his faithfulness and moral terpitude. I said I’d think about it and get back to him. My head is spinning. I have just replayed the last 30 years of my life in my head & tried to recount any questionable or fruitty behavior on his part. My fear is he’s going to grow a Key West Butt Tickler moustache and head off into to the sunset to club Pee-Pee Toucher based on my recommendation. I can’t live with that or the thought he could victimize others. My moral compass tells me, as much it will pain him & damage our friendship, to politely say no and that I have serious reservations about his motivations. Nik ruling please – am I being a d*ck & way out of line OR on the money?
I would never write that letter. It’s so sad that God and his employees cannot be trusted around children. Every time I see a church these days it makes me wonder.- nik
So what about all the other children that priest molested over the last 30 years?! That dudes a pussy, I’d goto the cops to stop the priest that molested your friend, and would not write the letter, most pedos are molested as children! How would you feel if your children were going to that church, wouldn’t you want to know if they may be being molested but too scared to talk?
One, How would Nik be a professional on anything? Two, What I got from the post was that “Because my friend was victimized as a child by a priest, now this friend is going to do the exact same thing in this position of power.” You, My OP sir, are an idiot.
Ninja you’re an idiot!
I voted for this.
OP, I feel as though if you really think this could happen you are absolutely justified- and infact obligated NOT to write any sort of recommendation for him. However, if you’re basing this on the fact that he confessed that he was molested as a child you may need to re-think it. He doesn’t deserve to have his dreams taken away from him simply because he was a victim. If he has displayed any sort of strange behaviour, and you wouldn’t trust your own kids with him with him being in a position of trust and authority, don’t write it.
Well first, this man needs professional therapy. I have a feeling that he wants to become a priest to continue the cycle of abuse. And your fear of that happening is totally valid, given the story and everything we know about priests these days.
Not only should you NOT write that letter you should immediately go to the authorities to complain about the molester. He may have done that countless times, and may still be doing it, they never change.
I am Catholic, and watching these Satanists destroy my church, really makes me sick.
nick you’re a fuckin idiot! God and his employees cannot be trusted around children? lol so your saying God cannot be trusted around children??? rephrase that comment you dumb ass that is very disrespectful!
And this would be why I don’t go to church. What does going to church prove? you can act hateful, condescending, and ruin children’s lives.
I went to the Catholic church, so things were a bit strict there. My dad went and the nuns taped his mouth shut, then used more to taped him to the chair. That’s plain abusive!
I got hit by a damn ruler at least 5 times. For laughing in Catechism classes. Imagine being told that if you weren’t baptized you go to purgatory or Hell. Don’t even get me started on confessions and penance.
Churches are a SCAM. George Carlin said it best, God always needs money, he sucks when it comes to money! You don’t need to show up at church, as long as you have faith.
Churches are for people that are assholes all week, then go to church Sunday like it never happened. Doesn’t work that way.
sorry for the TLDR but i cant stsnd people who abusevtheir
I totally agree with you. I tell this to my ex-Mormon husband all the time. He feels guilty from time to time because we don’t attend church. He believes church is full of good people etc. and I tell him church is really just full of people who have been bad and the guilt drives them to church. It makes them feel better about themselves to go. I’ve had friends of many different religions get molested while in church so my kids will NOT be attending! All you need is faith and to be a good person. If there’s a heaven you’ll get in
Dude, Nik. Way to sound like an ignorant a**.
got cut off up there but y’all know what im getting to with the abuse of power against children, and sometimes adults
A recommendation on how he kept his mouth closed about the dirty priest and let him continue on to do it to other children? Ya sounds about right…just the type they are looking for! Don’t write that letter. You will have thoughts and guilt about it for the rest of your life!
More like Satan’s employees.
Nik, God can be trusted animals maybe not so much.
That’s crazy nik. You have seen God? And hung out with him too? And you were there to witness him molest a child? Yea. Didn’t think so. Watch your mouth “God can’t be trusted with children”. Because God forbid anything happens to press hell be the first person you’re calling on. I Guarantee it. Don’t compare average evil humans with God. That’s it, thanks.
Wtf Nik! Is this a self help website or TheDirty?!
thats why “for better or for worse” is a joke.
A lot of child molesting articles lately. Scary world we live in.
What did GOD do, Nik? Poor choice of words.
sick fuck
Wait…so you’re saying because he’s a victim he’s going to become a molester himself? No, that does not always happen. And the fact you say you looked for “fruitty” by the way it’s “fruity” behavior, just seems so idioctic. If you’re worried about him as a friend, tell him so and ask that he get counseling. Don’t be a fucking jerk.
This is exactly what I pointed out.
What the fuck seriously. Kay first off; God did nothing to YOU. Second; it’s the human being who do this, so stop blaming God for your problems and third, since when does anyone believe in God in the first place. All you seem to do is hate on God and/or don’t believe in God; then you have problems and blame God. If you don’t believe in him then stop bring him into this, if you do believe in him it’s most likely that you just hate God anyways for no real good reason because God did nothing to You in the first place. If a person does it blame on the person or yourself, God clearly didn’t do this. I’m mean seriously for fuck sakes did God actually come down from the heavens in person to have a chat with you? Highly UNLIKELY! – this is mainly for Nik..
And for the priests that molest is probably one of those crazy cult churches, with crazy fucktards
Man, OP I’m sorry but if every person who was molested as a child became a molester themselves, we’d be up to our eyeballs in child molesters! I myself was molested, by another, much older child. I’ve NEVER, EVER contemplated or desired touching a child, never will. You have a right to your opinion, it’s your choice to write the letter or not, all I could ask is that you do it based on what you felt before he ever told you what he did, not knowing this would you have written the letter? I really don’t think it’s fair you change your opinion based on something an ADULT did to him as a innocent child. Now, if even before this you thought he may risk touching a child don’t write it, but then I would ask.. why the hell would you be friends with a person like that? Makes me a question your mindset. Definitely not acting like a very good friend. Your loss, not his. However, you’re the one who has to look in the mirror after all is said and done so do what you want.
Crazy! I was watching the news this morning and I guess the local LA Priest was caught raping little kids. Also, I believe either, the church or someone tried to cover it up? Don’t quote me on that though… its gnarly how soo many, damn priest are child rapist. Maybe the Catholic church should change their values? (ie priest don’t have sex) at the end of the day, priests’ r Human beings & we as humans,have sexual needs. So, they should be allowed to have sex and NOT touch a freaking kid!!!
AND UR 1 OF HIS EMPLOYEES nik SMH!