THE DIRTY ARMY: Hi Nik, this stupid bitch has been using people and ruining relationships for years and it’s about time she was put on blast, and I think you’re just the guy to help me do it. Her name is Mel, if you’re ever unfortunate enough to meet her she’s most easily recognized by her 40 year old soccer mom haircut or her 15 or so horrible tattoos. She’s covered in pictures of animals and stars it honestly looks like a twelve year old got to her with a pack of markers. Nothing demands respect like a frog on your thigh right? You’ll probably find her at a Wal-Mart or subway, but never on her own, there will always be someone else with her paying for her shit. She’s a dirty, useless parasite that will bitch and nag and make you feel obligated to buy her things because she’s too pathetic to support herself. Every job she gets (like 5 a year) she either quits cause she’s too lazy to drag her useless saggy ass out of bed before 10am, or gets fired. I think she’s litteraly earned less than 10 paycheques in 3 years, no joke. She’s never payed her own bills and has no concept of earning anything she has. Time for a wakeup call, hunny, 26 year olds should at least be able to pay their own phone bill! Not only does she take advantage of people financially but she has no problem with destroying relationships as well. She claims she’s been stomped on by so many men but don’t be fooled, those legs will spread at the slightest show of attention, wether she has a boyfriend or not. Everyone knows she’s cheated on every guys she’s been with including the dope she’s seeing now. Mel caught him bringing a bottle of wine to another girl’s place to ‘stay over and talk’ and took him back that night, telling all her friends that saw what was clearly going on to fck off in the process. These two are pefect for each other, Nik. But it’s time this dumb bitch got a reality check. Get a job, Mel. Then maybe you can get some of those disgusting tattoos removed!

What’s she showing off? cause it sure as hell isn’t her sun burn.- nik