THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, meet Sarah. Ke$ha wannabe( see the paintball explosion make-up on her face from a picture her friend took for a “ke$ha look a-like contest”) and beat down 30 year old that no man wants to settle down with because she has the belly of a 40 year old bud heavy drinker and arms the size of Serena Williams thighs. She works at a PetSmart grooming dingleberrys out of Iowa hicks’ pets and spends her time at dive bars hoping to get attention from halfway decent guys to spend money on her. So Nilk, do you think the ke$ha look is hot? Would you?

She must be a dog grooming all star with all the practice she has on herself.- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, the Pug dog of Iowa: Big eyed, no upper lip, and breath that reaks of an unwashed back side. Kelli Jean Cornish. 26 years old and a PROUD member of the “Iowa Bikini Team”. She’s a wannabe $30,000.00 millionaire, with no job. If you’re a wanna be model in Iowa, you’re obviously a shoe-in for the big time. A true gem. Nik let’s put this b*tch on blast… And would you?

She reminds me of a head of lettuce (iceberg), they’re never quit symmetrical, just like her face.- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY: So Nik, this chick works at the local Davenport, Iowa Hooters and she just thinks she is the hottest thing walking the earth. Like she is gods gift to Iowa. What a gift to be, right? I knew this girl before she got her  +2′s and ass, which is not much *ss to talk about. So anyways this girl needs to be brought down a peg or to. Her name Laken Marie Owen, she does some modeling and acts like such a hard-ass but at the same time a beauty queen but I have looked her up and she has some nudies floating around the internet.

I wish those wings were real so she could fly away and never come back.- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this douche thinks hes all that in Lincoln. He owns a concrete bussiness in Lincoln but spends most of the time at bars while is employees are out actually doing the work. He sleeps with any girl that will open her legs to him and finds it a game to sleep with married women or girlfriends. He spends most of the time trying to hook up with scanks at Grata. Husbands and boyfriends keep your woman close and your daughters closer. Nik put this douche on blast!

You didn’t even have to tell me he’s a douche, the Affliction shirt was a dead give away.- nik