THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, let me introduce you to the current reigning Johnson County Sloots Tag-team Champions, Kim and Christi! What can I say about these two that hasn’t already been said around town? Kim and Christi have been going at it for years and if youve ever been to the Johnson County bar scene you’ve most likely seen these two Jezebelles in action! You can find these two harlets at Mac’s Sports Pub if not Saints Pub and sometimes Ugly Joes. They’re always hanging onto every guys tubesteaks in hopes of getting free drinks. They’re heavy smokers and it shows by the reek of ashtray when you get near them and the aged wrinkly skin that sags below their ribs. All you have to do to get these sloots in bed is buy them some drinks and take them out to Ihop so they can stuff their faces with pancakes, sausage links and belgian waffles which would explain their unproportionate waistlines and beer guts. They are not picky at all with the types of guys they fuck they even love the purple crayon. But if you do pick them you might be dissapointed because their shit smells like fish and they certainly lay there like fish on their backs. These two sluts have kids that their baby daddies take on the weekends and sometimes during the week so they can party hardcore! These two have passed around their share of drd’s to the public and have spare amounts of amoxcylion laying around the house for that purpose! If one gets something, the other one does too because they like to share guys. Kim has been known to be a psycho girlfriend and stalks her ex’s and drunk texts them in the middle of the night and she completely forgets what she said or did the night before because she gets so faded. Christy dates guys and moves in with them just so they can pay her way and when she’s done with them she gets the law involved and lies to get them to kick him out resulting in his felony charges. These two hoebags will do anything to get what they want and if they don’t they will try to ruin your life. Kim got a job as a project coordinator without a degree or any experience and Im pretty sure she sucked some cocks to get that job. These two love drama and are as two-faced as they come even with their own friends! Who needs enemies when you have friends like these Nik? These two are always compaining on Facebook about how no guys ever take them seriously and that they cant find love but what do they expect when they cant even remember what they did the previous night? Kim has a boyfriend now but they poor guy is unwary of what Kim’s reputations is all about and he will find out very soon what she’s capable of. Nik please put these dynamic sloot duo on here so everyone who doesnt already know about them in Jo County will have a fighting chance to run and avoid Chlamydia! If anyone insists on taking the risk, I suggest double wrapping their jimmies and bringing a can of lysol with them!
It puts the sweater back on!- nik