THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey Nik, so I wanted to show you this girl that I’ve been noticing lately around Orange County. She goes by the name of Tessa Elizabeth. She’s currently living in Orange County and has been working at those Vietnamese Coffee Houses where the waitresses dress in lingerie and bikinis. She also did some modeling for Import Turner, BDazzled Swim Wear, and other lingerie lines. Word is although she acts like a h*e by working at coffee houses, she actually is nice and not stuck up. Also, based on her photos she hangs out with only Asians. She’s currently dating a dancer by the name of Dumbo who’s from Poreotics, the dance crew that won in the last season of America’s Best Dance Crew. By the age of 21, she’s worked at least 4 different Vietnamese coffee shops, has had breast implants, and buys shoes that are worth $900 a pair. Oh yeah, she isn’t a natural blonde but I am sure you would like her better as a blonde anyway. So, would you with this false blondie and if not give me at least two reasons why. Thanks!
Answer: No, she smells like noodles by default.