Would You With Non Mormon From Salt Lake

June 14, 2010 Salt Lake City, Utah, Would You? 18 7,878 Views

Nik, would you with non mormon from salt lake?

Nik, would you with non mormon from salt lake?

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I know Utah should be an abandoned state and everyone that isn’t mormon should jump ship and try making it in a better state BUT we do have a few girls that are amazingly beautiful. I cant let the trash from Utah that has been submitted thus far be the face of Utah! Meet Erica G. I went to high school with her and she was a sweet girl back then, and still is! I’m sure you’re thinking the girl lives in a tanning bed, but she’s half black! Thats why she has a pretty color and not oompa loomp looking! The only work she’s had done are her +2′s! She is by far the prettiest girl in Utah!! I know you have a ball n chain now, but would you with this brunette!?

Answer: No, she shoulda got braces to hold those horse teeth back.



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Nasty Thinks Shes A Hot Model

April 15, 2010 Los Angeles, Utah 24 6,089 Views

Nasty fatass thinks she is a hot model

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik  This is Monica Sa** AKA “Saxy Dreamr” as she calls herself, from Utah/L.A. She thinks she is a model/actress, but she is a short fatass and not cute enough to ever make it in the biz. She looks like she’s 50 years old, no joke. She thinks she’s famous and gorgeous, when in fact she looks like a used up old hag. She is as DUMB AS A ROCK and a f*cking slut. She preys on married men and is obsessed with getting married. Psycho bitch that obsesses over old boyfriends that are now married. She is a dirty Mormon slut. She is from American Fork, Utah, but currently lives in the Los Angeles area.

If your modeling shoot is on a picnic blanket then you should probably look for another job.- nik



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Annoying Couple JC Squared

March 5, 2010 Portland, Salt Lake City, The Dirty, Utah 23 7,818 Views

JC squared

JC squared

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this is JC and Jacey from Salt Lake City. They think just because they have the same name that they are cute, which obviously they are not! She is the biggest ditz ever, and together they are even worse. She thinks sticking out her fake +2′s gets her places, but please! Someone should have pointed out her pig nose and she should have gotten a rhinoplasty before the boob job. Luckily they are moving soon, good luck Portland, you’re next to experience JC squared.

I say it a million times- NOSE JOB before BOOB JOB, but you cannot have one without the other.- nik



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Felony Melanie

March 4, 2010 Dirty DUI, San Francisco, Utah 11 6,130 Views

Felony Melanie

THE DIRTY ARMY: This is mel hol**’s 3rd appearance on your site. This time the stink, x-mormon, sl*t acquired a sweet DUI/Hit and Run on her record over the past summer…i think she needs a mayjor intervention. Nik, what are your thoughts?’

I think it’s a shame she is bringing the red cup down as she crash and burns.- nik



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Fugly Dirt Bag

February 26, 2010 Chicago, Utah 17 8,833 Views

Fugly Dirt Bag

Fugly Dirt Bag

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this girl Kelsey is so mean to every other girl. She puts other people down to try to make herself feel better about her scummy (fake blonde hair) look. She deserves all the bad karma in the world for how much shit she has talked about EVERYONE. Sorry Kelsey, just because you moved to Utah doesn’t mean the people there will like you anymore than us Chicagoans. You’re a dumb bitch and I hope you’re enjoying having everyone (including your best friends) turn on you.

That dog is more visually appealing than her.- nik



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Bill Gates Fist Pumpin At Sundance

January 26, 2010 Salt Lake City, The Dirty, Utah 44 5,206 Views

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THE DIRTY ARMY: (celebrityclubber.com) Hey Nik, I guess everyone wants to be a guido these days, Check out these pics of Bill Gates getting down

Yeah I was at Sundance that night.  Bill Gates was doing more then just fist pumping, he must be a huge Jersey Shore fan (wife check?).- nik



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Best Costume Ever?

November 1, 2009 BYU, The Dirty, Utah 35 9,053 Views

Best Costume Ever?

THE DIRTY ARMY: nik best costume ever? what do you think? my buddy in utah.

You didn’t have to tell me he was from Utah… I could tell from the pinky finger.- nik



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Dustin B… Douchebag

October 8, 2009 The Dirty, Utah 74 10,059 Views

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Dustin Biegenwald aka D-Bag

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this is Dustin B**genwald of Clearfield, Utah. Notice his initials stand perfectly for D-Bag! This guy is the biggest D-bag I know! He is 22, living at home with his mom and brothers who he treats like sh*t. Has a job as a shuttle driver for a small town club called Bogey’s. I’m his ex thank god. but i supported him for 9 months while working my ass off to pay his bills while he stayed at my house and jacked off, watched porn, ate, and slept all day. He cheated on me with his ugly ass ex and used me, beat me, pulled out his shotgun and pointed it at me because he didn’t want me wearing makeup, choked me, hit me, etc. He acts like he’s the sweetest guy ever and then his true bipolar, psycho personality shows behind closed doors.

Man, I knew Mormons had closet secrets, but this shuttle driver takes the cake!  Also, judging from his downgrade in women he must be going blind.- nik



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