09.17.09

Caption of the Day

odd picture maybe use it for picture of the day

DIRTY ARMY, here is your beautiful picture for “Caption of the Day”.

Pee on the grapes? Please be funny and not racist.

Winner of this Caption of the Day wins a DIRTY ARMY Shirt guy or girl!

dirtygearcapday

CLICK HERE TO SEE MORE GEAR


Nik Richie

08.27.09

Craigslist Pimp

Craigslist Not The Best Online Dating

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this guy looks for girls on Craigslist San Antonio, and those are the Air Force girls he found! Thoughts?

Have fun with 4 shims, let me know what happens once the tuck and tape job falls off.- nik


Nik Richie

07.24.09

Chair Force Sloot

Posted in Air Force

Chair Force Hoe

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, This girl’s name is Sammy F. She is part time Air Force, part time h*e. She claims that she’s fighting for our country when realistically she fights on laptop figuring out how to pass time. She supposedly works with graphic design on remote controlled air planes.. Tell me how making a plane look pretty is doing anything for the United States. She claims she’s a virgin when we all know she can take a weiner in the B. She was engaged to some POS chair force co-worker who dumped her for a girl that works at Abercrombie. She just got 3 tats, two of which are little birdies above her V. Nik, put this h*e-bag on blast.

She only joined the Air Force because it’s the only time in her life where she will be the hottest girl anywhere. Everyone knows Air Force chicks are beat.- nik


Nik Richie

06.26.09

Former Iraq War Veteran Model

armymain3

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, would you with former Former Iraq war Veteran and Marine, Destiny Monique she is now a model and somewhat successful, Would you Nik I am sure it would mean a lot for you to support our troops.

Answer: No, having sex with a Marine no matter male or female makes you Gay.  I decided.


Nik Richie

06.25.09

Cows Plus Rocket Propelled Grenades Equals Fun

cow_scooter-copy

THE DIRTY ARMY: (Washingtonpost.com) - PHNOM PENH, Cambodia — Lan Kosal smiles wryly as he breaks down the cost of killing a cow with a rocket-propelled grenade launcher.

For $555, Mr. Lan, an arms merchant, says he will take a client to a remote field in the Cambodian countryside to obliterate a bovine with the Soviet-era armament designed to destroy tanks and cause mass casualties.

When many Cambodians earn less than a dollar a day, why is this grisly recreation that is popular among backpackers so expensive? “The real cost is the cow. You have to buy it before we let you kill it,” Mr. Lan explains matter-of-factly.

Click Here To Read The Full Story

Why don’t they just kill the Cambodians then… they are cheaper?- nik


Nik Richie

06.04.09

Military

Military slut

Military slut

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik,  This girl is Charlie Jo. Her fiance is in Iraq for his third term when all these pics were taken. She goes out and parties every night, coked out living in his house while planning the wedding. Also gets mad and breaks up with him every other week on Myspace…would you?

Answer: No, she looks like a troll. I wonder if Soldiers in Iraq have Wi-Fi?


Nik Richie

05.22.09

Caption of the Day

Posted in Air Force, The Dirty

Caption of the Day

DIRTY ARMY, here is your beautiful picture for “Caption of the Day”.

Air Force training?  Please be funny and not racist.

Link to previous winner - Envelope Please

Winner of this Caption of the Day wins a DIRTY ARMY Shirt guy or girl!

dirtygearcapday

CLICK HERE TO SEE MORE GEAR


Nik Richie

05.20.09

Hott Trailor Trash

Hott Trailor Trash

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, one simple question.. would you?.. and please be detailed, i know this gorgeous woMAN is too hott to handle.

Answer: No, her mouth is shut for a reason. I guarantee you her teeth are jacked.


Nik Richie

05.05.09

Navy Douche

navy douche

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, the tool on the left is Matt… the biggest douche at USNA! he is so full of himself and acts like his sh*t don’t stink. he’s cheated on everyone of his gf’s and hooked up with at least half the girls at the academy, supposedly he’s engaged now but we’ll see how long that lasts… this homo needs to be put on blast before he can spread any more diseases.

I only see two douchebags.- nik


Nik Richie

04.29.09

His Boats Sinking Faster Then The Titanic

His Boats Sinking Faster then the Titanic

THE DIRTY ARMY: This guy clearly takes the term “seaman” to a whole different level. He claims to be serving our country in the Navy, but the only service he is responsible for is the service he receives from the wh*res on the boat. Nik, this guy’s name is Joe and he is about to tie the knot, that is if he doesn’t hang himself with the rope first. His girlfriend Steph is the most gullible person you could ever meet. Steph is a culprit of believing that Joe is “working late” or “left his phone at work” when the only thing he is leaving is his greg is other chicks. I don’t think I have ever seen such a disgusting dude, not to mention a painfully gross couple. You can see the “happiness” in their eyes. This is precisely the recipe for an everlasting love especially when she’s the poor man’s verision of his ex-girlfriend that won’t give it to him anymore because she has realized what scum he is. What do you think?


I think his girlfriend should stop eating all the fatty food is she wants to look good in her wedding dress. No one likes a fat bride.- nik


Nik Richie


 

 

 

 

 
 

 

 

 

 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 

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+2 Factor: when a chick gets a boob job it increases her value two points on a ten point scale

+2's: fake boobs

30k Milli: a guy who claims he make millions, but really only make around $30k a year and spends all his money on stuff he can't afford; a poser

6 head (5 head): when a person has a enormous forehead (measured in inches)

Affliction: a brand of clothing worn by losers

Afro-Brow: hairy eyebrows

Air biscuit: fart

Anti-petite: no way near small

Aquaf*gs: underwater f*gs

Babushka: a big giant, Harlem Globetrotter-like afro, that explodes out of the panties of a Crabby Patty when panty security has been breached

Beak: Nose like a large bird

Beat: disgustingly ugly

Bissues: b*tch with issues

Blanimal: A black animal

Blast (putting someone on blast): putting someone in the spotlight and/or exposing them; talking crap about someone

Bucket Seats: nice ass

Butterface: everything looks good, but her face

Cadirack: not easy on the eyes, an eye sore

Caker: chick who wears way too much makeup

Cannibal: a lesbian. Because they eat their own kind

Car-Tastrophe: beat looking people in a car

Ceptor head: looks good except her head

Cheesecake: real fruity guy

Chubble: problems fat people cause.

Combustible Cougar: horny for young men

Combustible face: Hazardous look

Cougar in Training (Baby Cougar): a girl who will grow up to be a Cougar because her mom is one and/or she is starting to look and act like one

Cougars: women who are 40 or older who try to be 20 (by getting plastic surgery, wearing tons of makeup, dressing like they are 20, etc) and usually date or "prey" on younger men

Cougar-Troll: an ugly cougar

Cougarville: place where cougars come from

Cougarwood: place where famous cougars go

Cougrrrr: Very ugly cougar

Count gutula: big stomach

Crabby Patty: p*ssy

Crash test dummy: a dumb friend that you can convince to do anything

Dale Boy (Dales): a guy who claims to be straight but acts like he's gay (or really is just gay)

D-Bagalicious: sensational D-bag

D-Bag: Douche bag; someone who sucks at life; a total jerk

Dirty Army: the group of people who are fans of thedirty.com

Dirty Bird: dirty/sl*tty British chick

Don: a young female gold digger looking for a new wealthy father or sugar daddy

Douchetard: douche + retard

Drag Hag: someone who hangs with drag queens

DSL's: D*ck sucking lips

Dugout Driller: aggressive gay guy

Egg Roll(s): fat Asians

F*gadocious: super gay

F*gtastic: overly gay

F*gtician: professional f*gs

Fake SGM: people who are not in the Scissor Gang Mafia but pretend to be by giving the scissor gang sign in pictures (and NIk will point out the reason why they are not cool enough to be in it)

Fanny Pack's : beat girls that have no appeal

Farm: a person's ass

Fattastrophe: group of very fat people

Fifty cake mistake: big girl who loves cake

Fifty Yarder: only looks good from fifty yards away

File You Away: putting a hot guy/girl (whatever works for ya) in your mental hard drive so you can masturbate to them later

Flesbian: Fake lesbian

Forgy: Short for, "For the gays"

Frat Rat: a girl who loves to hang out with and/or screw guys in fraternities

Freetard: a free retard

Front Grill: teeth

F*ck Trophy: baby/kid..."What bout that chick you met at the club the other night, did you hit that?" "Naw she's got a f*ck trophy."

Fugly: f*cking ugly

FUPA: a fat upper pu**y area. Men can have it too.

Gaysian: a gay Asian.

Gestappo's : those who oppose the dirty army

Gills: side fat; love-handles

Grave Diggaz: dirty nails

Grazer: chick that likes to eat a lot

Green Bay: cellulite; cottage cheese

Gregalicious: Owns a greg

Greg-Juice: self explanatory

Greg: penis; tummy stick

Helmet Special: retard

Himstitute: tranny prostitute

Hoemerican: an American hoe

Horses (or any reference to a horse, stable, the derby, races or horse names): people with huge teeth and gums that resemble those of a horse

Insurgents: non SGM perpetrator/ enemies of the army

Jack Bauer: a person with a large fore head or a twenty forehead

Jay Leno: got a big chin

Kodiak: body of a bear

Lee push up bra: from the makers of lee press on nails

Long Head Clan: horse division ( horse head)

Lotto Baby: unknown father (a lot-of people hit that)

MAC Forcefield: tons and tons of makeup that looks clown-like

Mad Monkey: extremely drunk & out of control

Mick Jagger's : Big lips

Muffin Top: when a person's side or stomach fat bubbles over their waistband because their pants are too tight, forming the shape of a muffin

Multichin: multiple chins

Multi-Gregging: Gang bang on one chick

Nominee: person with no money

Nomo's: a place where no homo's are welcome

Noodles: referring to Asian people or descent

Nostrildahmus: Huge nose pipes

Onion: nice a$$

Oscar Myer: Got a Greg

Pack of franks: fat rolls on a chicks body..."Damn! look at the pack of franks on that chic"

Paki house/hut: liquor store

Patch Adams: balding

Pearl catcher: chicks who get c*mmed on

Pebbles: an attractive, yet underage and overly sexual young girl. (aka jailbait)

Pepperidge Farm: way too old

PGM ("Pinky Gang Mafia"): the rival gang of SGM whose members show their pinky finger when having a picture taken

Pickle Smoocher: rubs the Greg

Pig Fishing: guys who are out to just f*ck anything

Pirate: gay dude. Because they like semen on their poop deck

Poon lagoon: pu**y

Prop 8: gay person who wants to get married

Prosthetic Playa: fake wanna be player

Puffydumbbell: roid user

Purple Crayon: A black man's Gregr

Raisinets: ugly nipples

Red Cup Nation: those of us who agree that only red plastic cups should be used at parties (because all other colors are stupid)

Refund Gap: the huge gap between some women's fake boobs that is so big that they should get their money back from their doctor

Ronald Mcdonalds: High arching eyebrows

RVM: red vest mafia: Valet attendant

Sevenhead: means "Yes I ride the Short Bus!"

Sewerfront: Waterfront in Scottsdale

SGM ("Scissor Gang Mafia"): people who make a scissor/backward peace sign when having their picture taken

She-Boys: Trannys

Shim: a girl who looks like a man

Shimspital: hospital for shims

Shman: female type of man

Shopping Bags: droopy boob job or +2'S

Shotgun: a slutty chick. One cock and she's ready to blow

Shougar: a girl that is a cougar and a shim

Skankaholic: addicted to or being a skank; likes skanky chicks; an alcoholic skank

Ski Jumper: big or long nose

Slant F*cker: guy who only likes f*ckin asian chicks

Slim Slow Diet: a fat person who feels it necessary to show people her body..."Sick, see that fat girl in the bikini? Oh, she is feeling good about herself since she just got on the Slim Slow Diet."

Sloon: a chick that looks like she's mixed with snake lizard and baboon

Slug: Ugly slut

Snicker Licker: White girls who only like black guys

Soldier: a member of the Dirty Army; a fan/supporter of thedirty.com

Sorostitute: a girl in a sorority that is easier than a prostitute

Sphere Job: a boob job

Spongebob: a nasty female that has a crabby patty instead of a vagina

A Stallone: a really ugly Italian chick (or any chick for that matter)

Stay Puff: juice-muscular guy obviously on roids

Stretch Armstrong: face lift too tight

Sugar butt: a gay guy

Summer Teeth: some are here, some are there

Superhighway Gap: boobs miles apart

Synchronized Sucking : what aqua f*gs do

Talons: ugly toes

Tenderfoot: gay or feminine

Thunderstorm: extremely large thighs; thunder thighs

Too Fat Shakur:2-pac fat reference

Top Romin : a person that is broke

Tranimal: animal tranny

Tranny: a girl with so much makeup caked on her face that she looks like a transvestite

Tri-Tip: she can try the tip

Troff Feeder: an obese female

Trout: an older man who dates younger women in trying to be younger or "swim upstream"

Trout Mouth: looks like a fish

Tuna Factory: chick who has nasty lookin p*ssy lips..."That chicks gotta tuna factory goin on down there."

Unbeweavable: lots of weave

WNBA: a tall female who is manly

Would You?: means "would you screw this chick?"