THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik this Jersey Shore reject LAUREN PALMENTERA grew up in Cleveland but ass’pired to be a guidette from way back! Her idol is Snooki though this broads got 300lbs on Snooks! She couldn’t even be Snooki if she fed her eating disorders veggies in the closet then barfed them up in the toilet! Aside from eating disorders she has a baby daddy disorder where she sucks the jizz out and shoves it up her snatch to make Spanish babies she can keep for ransom aka child support! This welfare fraud expert gets foodstamps and a government check lying about her child support to the irs and the case workers! Lauren went to nursing school only to learn how to abuse old people in old folks homes, they fired her drunk and angry fat lazy azz and she lost her mind! Hot on the trail of a blind sugar daddy this hungry heffer is on the prowl so single men in the Cleveland area should beware!!! This is one hungry hippo, she may suck you dry but she will shove it up her mangina to make another child support baby! Better known as the neighborhood cat lady she smells like cat litter box and has flea bites all over her sloppy fat body! Lauren is a stanky skank alum of Holy Name HighSchool where her oversized slow kid couldn’t make it so he attends public school in the low rate suburb ghetto adjacent in a tiny house the two fatso slobs can barely fit into let alone the child support babies she houses in the basement like kidnap victims! Children beware as well! This crazy cat lady collects felines but once child protective services and custody courts take her children away she will start prowling the city streets looking for her own Cleveland kidnap victims she can hold hostage and brain wash a real Castro over here, this cow is one heafty hot mess!