11.20.09

Upgraded Would You?

cougarswould-you-copy

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik I don’t think you have seen any cougs like the ones we have in Miami.  They are all fit, tan and have all had surgery to fix something wrong with their face and of course +2’s.  Miami douches spoil these girls with ‘upgrades’ so we can all reep the benefits.  Would you with any of these fine specimens Nik?

Answer:  With a gun to my head and to fulfill my Cougar fantasies I would rail the one in Orange with my eyes closed.  Pretty sure the one with the blue top is packing heat.


Nik Richie

11.05.09

Milf

Posted in Cougars, New Orleans

Milf #329487

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, Chinese water torture, death by razor blade, or sticking your greg in just once. Your choice…….

Water torture.  I am afraid the emotional pain would be much worse if I stuck it in.- nik


Nik Richie

11.02.09

Brock’s Chick’s Mom

Brock's Chick's Mom, Would You?

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, here’s Brock’s Chick’s mom. She just recently wrote a book about seducing a wealthy man or some crap like that. I think she’s way hotter than BC. Staci’s mom definitely has got it going on.

Where is the book?  I want to read it.  I need to study their kind.- nik

**BC Mom can you please bid on this charity event?  I heard you are loaded and looking for youth.


Nik Richie

11.02.09

OC Cougars Halloween

OC Cougars Halloween

OC Cougars Halloween

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, check out the costumes on these old ladies, Halloween party with cougars!

Don’t you think the Firefighter costume would have been so much better if she glued a model fire truck in her REFUND Gap?- nik


Nik Richie

10.31.09

Hi Niky Poo

Hi Niky poo

THE DIRTY ARMY: Niky Poo how come you never return my texts I been sending you my pics to your phone and NO RESPONSE, so I sent my pic to you on the site maybe that might get your attention. I know I am a bit older than the girls you like but NIk what does a gal in her 30’s have to do to get you?

Please stop… Your body looks like it has had 10 babies.  If I wanted birthing hips I would date a 22 year old who could recover better.- nik


Nik Richie

10.27.09

Cougar Fuel

COUGAR FUEL

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik so now i know how these cougars stay up and party with the youngins…its cougar fuel.

Now there is a product that will fail.  Great concept… terrible timing.- nik


Nik Richie

10.23.09

Krusty Kristy The Couger

Posted in Cougars, Tampa

Krusty Kristy the couger

Krusty Kristy the couger

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this is Kristy a dirrty slut from the bay. She thinks she is so cool and can get any guy that she wants. She robs the cradle and was engaged to a guy who was 18 and she only knew him for 2 weeks before getting his name tattooed on her wrist. She thinks she is so hot by posting half naked pictures on her myspace hoping some guys will comment so she can f*ck them. .

Tattoos are a desperation move, I wonder where she is gunna get her next one..You should just cross that one off and put the next ones underneath it.- nik


Nik Richie

10.22.09

Liza Money Hungry Cougar

Posted in Cougars, Miami, The Dirty

999-copy11

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this mother is a dirty c*ke rat who bangs old guys and then ransoms them for cash or she will tell their wives or gf. She does tons of blow and is never home with her daughter. She is a ex stripper who was banging a regular whom his wife was dieing of cancer the whole time the affair was going on…you cant get any lower then that….SHE NEEDS TO BE A DIRTY CELEB FO SURE! P.S. LADIES BEWARE AFTER 2 DRINKS THE STRIPPER COMES OUT AND SHE WILL HANG ON ANY MAN THAT GIVES HER A LIL ATTENTION.

Her and Gretchen Rossi should exchange contact information.  They could be BFF’s.- nik


Nik Richie

10.20.09

Would You With This Cougar

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, i know this is a typical newport area cougar… but i have to know…  if no one in the world would ever find out… would you with this cougar?

Answer: No, it’s like the strings on her shirt double as a tape measure for her refund gap.- nik



Nik Richie

10.14.09

Malled By Cougars

Posted in Cougars, Houston

Malled by Cougars

THE DIRTY ARMY: These Old Ladies are Club rats, you can find then standing next to any bar owner who will give them free drinks. grandma on the left is Michelle, she is married although you wouldnt know it by all of the doorguys she has f*cked. Grandma closest to Stevie G is tracie A.K.A. The Praller she has been passed around the bar scene for years, she walks around in a c*ked induced coma scouting for the newest clubowner to prey upon. These girls have sent naked pics to my friends boyfriend and there was sores on their v*ginas…GROSSE!!!!

Can someone in the DIRTY ARMY who has received these naked pictures please send them to me so I can post them up here.  Thank you.- nik


Nik Richie


 

 

 

 

 
 

 

 

 

 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 

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+2 Factor: when a chick gets a boob job it increases her value two points on a ten point scale

+2's: fake boobs

30k Milli: a guy who claims he make millions, but really only make around $30k a year and spends all his money on stuff he can't afford; a poser

6 head (5 head): when a person has a enormous forehead (measured in inches)

Affliction: a brand of clothing worn by losers

Afro-Brow: hairy eyebrows

Air biscuit: fart

Anti-petite: no way near small

Aquaf*gs: underwater f*gs

Babushka: a big giant, Harlem Globetrotter-like afro, that explodes out of the panties of a Crabby Patty when panty security has been breached

Beak: Nose like a large bird

Beat: disgustingly ugly

Bissues: b*tch with issues

Blanimal: A black animal

Blast (putting someone on blast): putting someone in the spotlight and/or exposing them; talking crap about someone

Bucket Seats: nice ass

Butterface: everything looks good, but her face

Cadirack: not easy on the eyes, an eye sore

Caker: chick who wears way too much makeup

Cannibal: a lesbian. Because they eat their own kind

Car-Tastrophe: beat looking people in a car

Ceptor head: looks good except her head

Cheesecake: real fruity guy

Chubble: problems fat people cause.

Combustible Cougar: horny for young men

Combustible face: Hazardous look

Cougar in Training (Baby Cougar): a girl who will grow up to be a Cougar because her mom is one and/or she is starting to look and act like one

Cougars: women who are 40 or older who try to be 20 (by getting plastic surgery, wearing tons of makeup, dressing like they are 20, etc) and usually date or "prey" on younger men

Cougar-Troll: an ugly cougar

Cougarville: place where cougars come from

Cougarwood: place where famous cougars go

Cougrrrr: Very ugly cougar

Count gutula: big stomach

Crabby Patty: p*ssy

Crash test dummy: a dumb friend that you can convince to do anything

Dale Boy (Dales): a guy who claims to be straight but acts like he's gay (or really is just gay)

D-Bagalicious: sensational D-bag

D-Bag: Douche bag; someone who sucks at life; a total jerk

Dirty Army: the group of people who are fans of thedirty.com

Dirty Bird: dirty/sl*tty British chick

Don: a young female gold digger looking for a new wealthy father or sugar daddy

Douchetard: douche + retard

Drag Hag: someone who hangs with drag queens

DSL's: D*ck sucking lips

Dugout Driller: aggressive gay guy

Egg Roll(s): fat Asians

F*gadocious: super gay

F*gtastic: overly gay

F*gtician: professional f*gs

Fake SGM: people who are not in the Scissor Gang Mafia but pretend to be by giving the scissor gang sign in pictures (and NIk will point out the reason why they are not cool enough to be in it)

Fanny Pack's : beat girls that have no appeal

Farm: a person's ass

Fattastrophe: group of very fat people

Fifty cake mistake: big girl who loves cake

Fifty Yarder: only looks good from fifty yards away

File You Away: putting a hot guy/girl (whatever works for ya) in your mental hard drive so you can masturbate to them later

Flesbian: Fake lesbian

Forgy: Short for, "For the gays"

Frat Rat: a girl who loves to hang out with and/or screw guys in fraternities

Freetard: a free retard

Front Grill: teeth

F*ck Trophy: baby/kid..."What bout that chick you met at the club the other night, did you hit that?" "Naw she's got a f*ck trophy."

Fugly: f*cking ugly

FUPA: a fat upper pu**y area. Men can have it too.

Gaysian: a gay Asian.

Gestappo's : those who oppose the dirty army

Gills: side fat; love-handles

Grave Diggaz: dirty nails

Grazer: chick that likes to eat a lot

Green Bay: cellulite; cottage cheese

Gregalicious: Owns a greg

Greg-Juice: self explanatory

Greg: penis; tummy stick

Helmet Special: retard

Himstitute: tranny prostitute

Hoemerican: an American hoe

Horses (or any reference to a horse, stable, the derby, races or horse names): people with huge teeth and gums that resemble those of a horse

Insurgents: non SGM perpetrator/ enemies of the army

Jack Bauer: a person with a large fore head or a twenty forehead

Jay Leno: got a big chin

Kodiak: body of a bear

Lee push up bra: from the makers of lee press on nails

Long Head Clan: horse division ( horse head)

Lotto Baby: unknown father (a lot-of people hit that)

MAC Forcefield: tons and tons of makeup that looks clown-like

Mad Monkey: extremely drunk & out of control

Mick Jagger's : Big lips

Muffin Top: when a person's side or stomach fat bubbles over their waistband because their pants are too tight, forming the shape of a muffin

Multichin: multiple chins

Multi-Gregging: Gang bang on one chick

Nominee: person with no money

Nomo's: a place where no homo's are welcome

Noodles: referring to Asian people or descent

Nostrildahmus: Huge nose pipes

Onion: nice a$$

Oscar Myer: Got a Greg

Pack of franks: fat rolls on a chicks body..."Damn! look at the pack of franks on that chic"

Paki house/hut: liquor store

Patch Adams: balding

Pearl catcher: chicks who get c*mmed on

Pebbles: an attractive, yet underage and overly sexual young girl. (aka jailbait)

Pepperidge Farm: way too old

PGM ("Pinky Gang Mafia"): the rival gang of SGM whose members show their pinky finger when having a picture taken

Pickle Smoocher: rubs the Greg

Pig Fishing: guys who are out to just f*ck anything

Pirate: gay dude. Because they like semen on their poop deck

Poon lagoon: pu**y

Prop 8: gay person who wants to get married

Prosthetic Playa: fake wanna be player

Puffydumbbell: roid user

Purple Crayon: A black man's Gregr

Raisinets: ugly nipples

Red Cup Nation: those of us who agree that only red plastic cups should be used at parties (because all other colors are stupid)

Refund Gap: the huge gap between some women's fake boobs that is so big that they should get their money back from their doctor

Ronald Mcdonalds: High arching eyebrows

RVM: red vest mafia: Valet attendant

Sevenhead: means "Yes I ride the Short Bus!"

Sewerfront: Waterfront in Scottsdale

SGM ("Scissor Gang Mafia"): people who make a scissor/backward peace sign when having their picture taken

She-Boys: Trannys

Shim: a girl who looks like a man

Shimspital: hospital for shims

Shman: female type of man

Shopping Bags: droopy boob job or +2'S

Shotgun: a slutty chick. One cock and she's ready to blow

Shougar: a girl that is a cougar and a shim

Skankaholic: addicted to or being a skank; likes skanky chicks; an alcoholic skank

Ski Jumper: big or long nose

Slant F*cker: guy who only likes f*ckin asian chicks

Slim Slow Diet: a fat person who feels it necessary to show people her body..."Sick, see that fat girl in the bikini? Oh, she is feeling good about herself since she just got on the Slim Slow Diet."

Sloon: a chick that looks like she's mixed with snake lizard and baboon

Slug: Ugly slut

Snicker Licker: White girls who only like black guys

Soldier: a member of the Dirty Army; a fan/supporter of thedirty.com

Sorostitute: a girl in a sorority that is easier than a prostitute

Sphere Job: a boob job

Spongebob: a nasty female that has a crabby patty instead of a vagina

A Stallone: a really ugly Italian chick (or any chick for that matter)

Stay Puff: juice-muscular guy obviously on roids

Stretch Armstrong: face lift too tight

Sugar butt: a gay guy

Summer Teeth: some are here, some are there

Superhighway Gap: boobs miles apart

Synchronized Sucking : what aqua f*gs do

Talons: ugly toes

Tenderfoot: gay or feminine

Thunderstorm: extremely large thighs; thunder thighs

Too Fat Shakur:2-pac fat reference

Top Romin : a person that is broke

Tranimal: animal tranny

Tranny: a girl with so much makeup caked on her face that she looks like a transvestite

Tri-Tip: she can try the tip

Troff Feeder: an obese female

Trout: an older man who dates younger women in trying to be younger or "swim upstream"

Trout Mouth: looks like a fish

Tuna Factory: chick who has nasty lookin p*ssy lips..."That chicks gotta tuna factory goin on down there."

Unbeweavable: lots of weave

WNBA: a tall female who is manly

Would You?: means "would you screw this chick?"