I “Workout” And Am Self Absorbed

July 7, 2014 Dallas 1

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, Michelle Bernal’s goal in life is to see if she can max out her Facebook and Instagram. She just wants to take 5,000 more selfies and get nasty guys she doesn’t even know to like and comment on them. I’m a good guy who knows her well and would love for her to give me a chance. She leads me on and then the minute her cheating ex came back into the picture, boom. It’s completely obvious that she just wants people to compliment her and make her feel better about herself. She also constantly talks about working out…well she does do it sometimes but the majority of the time, well, she just knows how to take pictures to make her look skinny! It’s really almost sad that she needs the love and affection of her Facebook guy “friends” to make her feel good about herself. Maybe it’s because she has never gotten over her cheating ex who she still wants…I mean really care a little more about yourself. I tried to give her a chance..I’m a good guy and it was obvious she wasn’t ready to move on. She needs to fix her self confidence/obsessive selfie issues and maybe she’ll get a good guy. Wait, maybe she’ll just end up back in her ex-boyfriend’s cheating arms where she belongs. You would never know she had a kid besides the fact she has her name tattooed on her. I mean if you carried about your child would you really friend thousands of strangers and Facebook and then check in at places?! Do you want to get hurt or raped by some strange guy who obsesses over your every selfie on Facebook and Instagram? Come on Michelle, let’s grow up…so here’s some “skinny” pics and then the real her.

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Love Is So Much Better Than Money

July 6, 2014 Dallas, Hollywood, The Dirty 54

THE DIRTY ARMY:  Nik, whoever compared Keisha and Abigail’s relationships is an idiot. Both are very different and only one of them matters and that is Keisha’s.  As you can see in her eyes and that authentic smile, you can tell she is truly happy and satisfied with her life, even though she missed her window on making it in Hollywood and its obviously why Abigail Ratchford is making it, her boyfriend is paying for it. Lol, that is not making it by the way.

Keisha has the best of both worlds… rich guys still tip her big money and she has true love > being famous in Hollywood.- nik

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What Is Wrong With Buff Chicks

July 6, 2014 Dallas, The Dirty 135

THE DIRTY ARMY:  Nik, you need to get rid of your fear of buff chicks. Don’t knock it until you’ve rocked it. There is nothing better than a woman who can hold you down and punch you in the face during sex. I highly recomend it. Check out this beauty. She would rock your world.

I think I will pass.- nik

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Ronald Dale Ackers Is Not So Bright

July 5, 2014 Dallas, The Dirty 8

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this weirdo Ronald Dale Ackers got dumped by his girl and she moved over 1,000 miles away from him to Tennessee.  In his effort to win her back, he drove to her new residence and planted a recording device in her bedroom so he could spy on him, luckily Ronald is not too bright because the recorder had a bright orange light and was very easy to find… so the dude got arrested for a bunch of charges and drove 1k miles for no damn reason.

Love makes you do crazy things.- nik

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Kelly Helleson Loves Performing Cavity Searches

July 3, 2014 Dallas, The Dirty 40


THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, so police officer Kelly Helleson pulled over 2 women for a cigarette butt being thrown out of a car and smelling a bit of weed so she decided to give them both an intense cavity search but luckily it was done in front of the dash cam. She lost her job and only got 2 years probation for it, but if it was a man doing this, I feel like he would have gone to jail for a very long time. Why do girls get treated different from men when they hold the same job/position?

Lesbian.- nik

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Olesha Ferrari Is So Hungry For Attention It’s Disgusting

June 30, 2014 Chicago, Dallas, Newport, Scottsdale, The Dirty, Vancouver 222



THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, so this girl announced on her instagram months ago that she was prego and all the creeps stopped liking her pictures and writing all these comments about how hot and sexy she is.  Well, she couldn’t take it and decided to start posting near naked pictures and her huge prego stomach.  Like lady, that is cool to share with family, but to let every weirdo on the net see it is very disturbing.

Are we positive she is pregnant? The side fat rolls are throwing me off.- nik

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My Girlfriend Has The Biggest Feet Ever

June 29, 2014 Dallas, The Dirty 315


THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, my girlfriend is 5’9 and I have one big issue with her.  I stand at 6’8 so I have always dated girls that are atleast 5’7 or taller.  When I first met my girl, I never thought I’d date her since my friends and I use to make fun of how big her feet are, she can fit into a mens size 15 with no issue, like we called her Big Foot the whole time.  But now that we are taking things very serious and I’m head over heels in love with her, but her huge ass feet bother the sh*t out of me, its like almost disturbing.  Do you know if there is any type of surgical procedure to fix big feet.  I’ve been researching and have found some doctors in China who can break the bone and remove parts of the foot to make it smaller.  Have you heard of this procedure and do you recommend it?  I feel like this issue is preventing us from marriage.

I feel like it would be cheaper to find another soulmate.- nik

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Give it up Jason Burgeois

June 26, 2014 Dallas 17

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, please tell this 30k douche millionaire to retire the Dallas party scene already. It’s embarrassing to see him out every night considering he’s good friends with my dad. Everyone has a different story about him because he lies about his identity all the time. He used to live at jaguars and other grungy strip clubs combing strippers he could give them a better life, but after sleeping with them he’s on the the next. He’s dating a 20 year old who looks 15 and she’s only staying with him because she has his drd.

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