THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik,. This is Matt. He thinks he’s the sh*t because he’s tan and “built”. What most of his female victims don’t know is that he used to be the fat kid in high school, until he moved out after graduation and lost all his weight – literally, all of it. His extracurricular activities are tanning, going to the gym everyday, having “dates” with his bff (another gym junky), shooting needles full of steriods into his *ss, taking pictures of his lumpy d*ck and sending them to multiple girls, lying his *ss off, shaving his entire body, chasing after girls fresh outta high school (he’s 25!), and studying the movie “How to be a Player”. He is the most pathetic wanna-be Jersey Shore player. Everytime he runs around on a girl, he gets caught. What kind of player is that? He is 100% FAKE. The best part of it all is that he claims interracial relations is “gross”, but he recently started running around with a black girl. Ladies, take the warning . . . He’s NO good!

Tan and in shape…sure you sent in the right pics.  This guy looks like he slices pepperonis for a living.- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY:  Nik,  Ronnie is sooo the worst of the Jersey shore cast he was at “the dizzy Bulldog” in DE saturday night… He must be the lowest paid! But look he must be off the juice, he shrunk, and now is trying to rep SGM!

These guys are trying to get $30k an episode for next season.  I personally think only Snookie and The Situation should get $20k each and the others should get $5k each per episode.- nik

DIRTY ARMY, here is your beautiful picture for “Caption of the Day”.

YMCA Forgy? Please be funny and not racist.

Winner of this Caption of the Day wins a DIRTY ARMY Shirt guy or girl!

CLICK HERE TO SEE MORE GEAR

Last Caption (Click Here) Winner: Big D

King of the Hill the early years.

THE DIRTY ARMY: Hi Nik! I am now OBSESSED with your site! I find myself thinking and speaking in “The Dirty” language. Because I’m on here daily, I know you say “No” to 90% of the girls on here. I also know you think every girl from University of Delaware is beat and shouldn’t go out without a bag over her head. Well, I think I have the needle in the haystack- meet Kate. She’s definitely top 5 at this school (I know that’s not saying much to you), but she’s still as chill and humble as they come. I’m a straight girl, but I think she’s super pretty! So Nik, I won’t ask “Would You?” I’ll ask “How Could You Not?” Again, she’s super chill and humble. So even if you have to say “No,” please be nice!

She is normal looking.  She looks like she eats salads and salads are sexy.  I would talk to her about life.- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, Fargo North Dakota. That’s all I have to say.

 I don’t even have a North Dakota section, so I put this is Delaware. I mean they are both pointless states with beat, fat chicks.- nik

DIRTY ARMY, here is your beautiful picture for “Caption of the Day”.

Yoga? Please be funny and not racist.

Link to previous winner - Envelope Please

Winner of this Caption of the Day wins a DIRTY ARMY Shirt guy or girl!

CLICK HERE TO SEE MORE GEAR