THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I’m one of JV’s buddies and I wanna put him on blast.  He is always talking about these crazy parties you guys are having, he makes frequent updates on how many bottles he’s popped or snapping pics of a bunch of broads and posting it.  My problem is I have yet to be invited on one of these trips.  I know you can’t bring out a bunch of dudes out with you but I figured he could squeeze us in every once in a while.  If not stop rubbing it in our face bra!! We get it, you have the best job ever, you dont need to post “another great start to the greatest job on earth” every single day to remind us.

Why would I want to invite his guy friends? That doesn’t sound fun to me. I get paid to drink, converse with average looking women and take pictures like a zoo animal (white tiger exhibit as I call it). The last thing I need is another Junior Varsity level guy in my ear telling me how great I am and asking for my cell phone number.- nik

**Attention: above average ladies, the White Tiger Exhibit is this Friday at PURE main stage (Las Vegas). Bottles on me because it is a celebration of the good life.

JUNIOR VARSITY: Nik, you recall last week how Scooby kept on bragging about how he had a super hot date for Friday night and when he showed you her FB profile you started cracking up and said “photoshop is for liars”?  and then Scooby replied “Yes, I agree but these pictures are not photoshopped”.  Well its Tuesday and he refuses to say one word about the date, and the girl.  I assumed it didn’t go well, and with the FB pictures Scooby just uploaded, well its safe to say the girl must have been a black belt in photoshop.  Nik, what you think about Scooby’s new pictures?

Scooby is the nice guy who will never find love because he believes his heart will guide his destiny. Bro, your heart is going to make you broke and lonely for the rest of your life. Stop chasing photoshop dreams on FB and start slaying some of my leftovers. I am sick of having you morons hang out with me and just stare at chicks. Girls don’t go to these events because they want to make friends. They go because they want you to choke them and pull their hair afterwards… some even like it when you spit on them (if there from Dallas). Scooby, I am putting you on probation until you rail Amanda Reed or an equivalent.- nik

JV’s Facebook: “Everyone have a great Tuesday, remember we only live once so make everyday a good one.”

My employee Junior Varsity’s whole life revolves around his Ex-Girlfriend DreamKiller Courtney. BRO, LET IT GO! You have the greatest job in the world and access to the hottest chicks in the world. Look at this video he posted on his Facebook wall this morning for his Ex-DreamKiller to see. JV, stop reaching! She left you! I understand you thought she was the one and you are even planning to move to Huntington Beach because that is Courtney’s favorite city (She is not going to come Noah). Listen, take my advice… the same advice I gave Scooby. When your heart thinks of her just close your eyes picture her new boyfriend blowing his load on her face. End of story!- nik

SCOOBY: Nik, just thought of one. JV already knows kinda cause we call Andy C.(previously known as Gorgeous)it.  The Hurt Locker – A male companion who’s sole responsibility is to disarm the grenade/landmine amongst a group of women. He is really the one that keeps the party going cause the “hater” doesn’t make all her girls leave.  Take that Jersey Shore! Yea buddy!

Scooby, that is not bad.- nik

JUNIOR VARSITY: Nik, this past weekend in Tampa Bay was insane, but it didn’t feel like we went down there for your last birthday party of the year, and Spring Break Kick-Off… Because the whole trip seemed like it was about Scooby, from the second the camera’s start rolling Scooby turned into DJ Scooby D… just took over everything.  I tried talking to girls at the club, he would walk up to me and say “Yo, JV I got dibs on that 1 as well”, then he gets on top of the bar and just start pouring drinks into every girls mouth.  And on top of that DJ Scooby D had to go break a table at The Venue when “No Hand’s” by Wakka Flakka came on.  Can you imagine how crazy his birthday party in Tampa is going to be this year?

Scooby Sunday was in the zone last weekend. I wonder if Tsunami has the video surveillance from The Venue of that night? The world wants to see how Scooby broke the table… it was the most amazing belly flop ever.- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I heard about TheDirty.com when I saw the Dr. Phil Show and my first impression of you was very bad, I hated you and your stupid website but after going on it a few times, I realized you are just doing people a favor and giving them a chance to change their lives.  So maybe last month or 2 I have been really into the site and have been trying to get familiar with all the Dirty Celebs.  Well I came across Junior Varsity and LOL I couldn’t believe it was Anthony.  JV and I went to high school together at Centennial, and all through out high school JV was known for 2 things.  1.  his ability on the football field, and 2.  the awesome parties his parents would let him have.  I’m pretty sure he is still making Cheech and Chong proud and probably doesn’t even remember that our Senior Year, JV was named “most likely to party till their 50″.  That’s why I’m not surprised he is working with TheDirty and still out there partying and living life.  Here is the proof from our year book.  See you next year for our 10 year graduation party JV.

Crazy, he is still wearing the same shoes and banging the same looking chicks like the one pictured.- nik