Thickness | Nik Richie + Dirty Army intel, opinions, gossip, satire, and celebrities - Part 4

The Crew Is Getting Back Together

August 19, 2013 Las Vegas, Scooby Snack, The Dirty, Thickness 115


THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, looks like the gang is getting back together.  After nearly a year of talking sh*t about each other, Scooby Snack and Thickness are back to being friends and hanging out and making money.  I’m glad they got their sh*t straight because fighting over John’s and sleeping with each others boyfriends is not worth losing friends over.  Get that money girls and don’t let the haters ruin you.

Now that we know they are close to 30 years old who would want to sleep with them?- nik

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Is Everyone Blind

August 15, 2013 Las Vegas, The Dirty, Thickness 22

THE DIRTY ARMY: Okay, so this is Thickness’s cover photo on her facebook, it’s obviously old as hell but um IS EVERYONE BLIND?! It has almost 1,000 likes, tons of comments, and none mention the utterly TERRIBLE photoshop warping in the photo. Hahahha does anyone see her side boob, warped weird hair by it, jagged arms, jagged lower stomach, and randomass blurry line on her upper back? Like really? Did no one notice this? Not one person commented about it? It’s shocking that almost 1,000 people didn’t notice it when it’s so obvious and horrible. And what’s even MORE shocking, is that she edited it and thought “mkayz dis lookz so reel haha ermahgerddd POST!” I’m wondering if she edited it wasted drunk with both eyes closed.

Thickness should hire a third party to do her boob lifts and back cuts. The medication she is on is altering her Photoshop skills.- nik

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Does Thickness Think We’re Retarded

August 14, 2013 Las Vegas, The Dirty, Thickness 35

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, have you seen Sarah Scheller aka Thickness’s Instagram pictures lately? She’s been obviously using some kind of photoshop tool to make her look unnaturally narrow and thin. She looks like an alien in these pictures. I had a lot of hope for her that after her stay in Israel, she would finally get her act together…..but by the looks of these pictures, Miss Scheller is either on meth again, warping her brain into thinking that these pictures look realistic, or she is just downright stupid. What do you think?

I think the only way Thickness will ever get better is to delete all her social networks. Stop demanding approval from people you don’t know.- nik

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Thickness Should Stop Having “Friends”

June 17, 2013 Las Vegas, The Dirty, Thickness 85


THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, Sarah Scheller aka Thickness really needs to choose her “friends” better. Everyone that she brings into her life either hurts her or drops her. She was really close to Kina (Scooby Snack), that went sour. Now Sarah Rissell is not her friend anymore. And her “friends” in NY, aren’t really her friends at all. Ashley and Jill talk so much sh*t about Sarah behind her back and then when she is in NY, they are all of a sudden so excited to see her. And when she leaves they talk sh*t about the encounters they had with her. Poor Sarah, when will she learn?

I blame her weight fluctuation. Thickness should be married with babies at this stage in her life, instead she is chasing delusions.- nik

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The Mother Land Has Done Thickness Well

June 11, 2013 Las Vegas, Thickness 30

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, Thickness has been in her motherland for the past few weeks and it changed her for the positive.  Check out what she looks like when she doesn’t cake on all that make up.  I hope she reads this and starts wearing less of it because she looks 10 times better.  I wanted to see if you or the DA agree with me.  Lets change Thickness for the good.

Where is this Mother Land?- nik

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Poor Thickness Got Dumped

May 19, 2013 Las Vegas, The Dirty, Thickness 95

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, so Thickness is in New York.  If you are smart, you know exactly what she is doing there.  Anyway, it looks like she got dumped by her boyfriend and is very upset about it.  What I wanted to remind her, is that she will always be #2 and her man’s next girl will not be a downgrade.  Just like she was #2 behind Scooby Snack for years.

Why doesn’t she go after black athletes? She has the perfect body for it.- nik

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What Is Wrong With Thickness’ Lips

April 23, 2013 Las Vegas, The Dirty, Thickness 170

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I want to know what is going on here in this terrifying photo Thickness posted on her Facebook. I noticed the lips were larger, then they started getting more and more larger, and now it is larger than that of a fish. I would imagine this means more clients to finance the syringes of Juvederm it takes to achieve this “pout” but I have to wonder if the need for these larger than life lips is to conceal the missing teeth in her mouth. Help me, and us all, understand this phenomenon Nik.

The upper lip should never be larger than the bottom lip. Very unattractive and forced… makes me think a woman is terrible in bed when I see sh*t like this. I decided.- nik

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What Happened To Thickness’ Hotness

April 23, 2013 Las Vegas, Thickness 9

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, Thickness use to be so hot!!! Now she looks terrible and has gained so much why would she do this to herself? Whats to come of her life? Do you think she can make a turn around? I’m honestly curious to see where she’s gonna be in 5 years. She’s getting to old and fat to be a little blonde Vegas escort barbie partying every night.

She looks a little shiny in the nostril area.- nik

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