Honolulu | Nik Richie + Dirty Army intel, opinions, gossip, satire, and celebrities - Part 5

Moving Doesn’t Cover Trash

May 20, 2013 Honolulu, Phoenix 66

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik this fat whore, Ashley (a.k.a. “Trashley”) has been on theDirty.com in the past, but she’s worth another mention. She used to live in Arizona, but once she fcked every guy in the Phoenix metro area (and probably most of Tucson), she moved to Hawaii, where she is slowly spreading her herpes across the main island (you can clearly see the herpes on her face in the photos I have attached). She is an alcoholic and has had multiple DUIs (her red alcoholic flush is also visible in aforementioned pictures). When she lived in AZ, she claimed she was a “personal trainer”, but really she was (and still is) a cocktail waitress. I don’t know about you, Nik, but I wouldn’t trust a personal trainer that is as fat as she is. She is covered in freckles because she tans way too much, which also explains her Oompa-Loompa skin tone and wrinkles on her face. You would think she would use makeup to try and cover her fcked up face/alcoholic flush/up, but maybe she’s smarter than we all realize and already knows that no amount of makeup would make her look even somewhat decent. On top of being “blessed” with looks akin to Ke$ha, a lard ass, and being a whore, she is also batshit crazy. She’s bulimic (clearly that isn’t working out too well for her), has a cocaine problem, and has also stalked not only my boyfriend, but also ME. She lived in the same apartment complex as him and followed him around all the time. He felt sorry for her (before he realized how crazy she is) and hung out with her a few times, in which she repeatedly tried to fck him. He politely shut her down more than a few times, then one night he got drunk and fucked her (using a condom, thank God), and said her p*ssy was so loose he couldn’t even c*m. He blew her off and ignored her until she got the point that he wasn’t interested in her and then she moved to Hawaii. When she came back to visit AZ about a year later, she went into my boyfriend’s workplace (full well knowing he had been in a serious relationship with me for quite some time) and tried to kiss him on the lips. He pushed her away from him and later that night she started blowing up his phone. This I actually witnessed with my own eyes. She kept texting him, inviting herself over to our house and wanting to hang out. She offered to bring – in her words, verbatim – “a cheap bottle of wine”… some classy chick, huh? I had no interest in meeting her and he had no interest in seeing her, but she kept texting him, and he kept ignoring her. In the week that she was in AZ, she visited him at his work over five times, all of which he avoided her purposefully (except for the for occurrence, in which he was caught off guard). Now, for the really crazy shit – while she happened to be in AZ, I had magenta/pink streaks added to my hair, and just happened to be photographed that night. Someone took a picture of my boyfriend and me and tagged me in it. THE VERY NEXT DAY… Trashley posts pictures of her hair, which just so “happened” to be a bad replica of what I had just had done (professionally) to my hair. At that point, my boyfriend sent her a text message telling her she needed to fck off and that he clearly made a huge mistake with her. He told her he was only nice to her because he felt sorry for her, and that he never had any real interest in her. He also called her out on how she “copied” my hair, and told her that it was creepy. She didn’t even deny it! She also has tried adding me on Facebook so many times I lost count. On the same night she colored her hair to look like mine, she added me – no exaggeration – over 30 times on Facebook. As soon as I would hit “Decline” there would be another request from her, and it didn’t stop until I blocked her. Now she’s dating a short, old guy that looks like one of the Thai monks in The Hangover 2. She should stick with him, because she definitely won’t do any better in life.

I’m starting not to mind all this over exposure.  Soon it’ll be all eyes (only eyes w/+2 shadows) all the time, once it hits a cover.- nik

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Poisonous Womanizer

May 8, 2013 Honolulu 19

THE DIRTY ARMY: I would like to introduce everyone to the biggest piece of shit known to mankind. a person who cheats on every woman he is with, beats on some of them because they catch him in his bullshit, abandons any child he fathers(including the one on the way), uses his petty lies to get what he wants such as money, anything materialistic, sex, sympathy etc. he has no heart and has not a single problem messing with the lives of people who don’t deserve it. he claims to be the victim of everything, slandering his ex wife, ex girlfriends and even wishing death on his unborn child! he spends more time drinking and spending money on his bikes rather then helping support his kids. he fools people into believing he is a good man, a good friend and a good father, rather then showing people his true colors and that he is a worthless piece of shit. he would rather stay in Hawaii then go be with his sick mother and see any of his children or be there for the birth of his soon to be 5th child, he gets married instead to someone just after 2 months of knowing them because hes so desperate for money and cant get a job after being kicked out of the army. he passes that lovely gift that keeps on giving. this my friends, is Joseph Luis Alamo, hes 30, and has yet to grow up and be an adult and take responsibility. he deserves to be blasted, and for people to know who he really is. believe it or not, this is him. a worthless piece of shit. this is only half of the shit this mother fcker has done. if you have any respect for yourself, stay far away from this sick fck.

Does every member of his gang get a photoshoot?- nik

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Chevelle Credo Is Not To Favored In Oahu

May 8, 2013 Dirty Army Strong, Honolulu 15

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this Chevelle Credo.  She loves to she sleep around with married men and single guys but yet she has a boyfriend and a kid that she don’t care about. Everyday she goes out looking for someone new to sleep with. She thinks she better then everyone else. She look’s like an ugly tranny with fake boob’s that her boyfriend spent Grands on.  Wanted to warn girlfriends on the island.

She look and sounds like a native.- nik

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Guys, Watch Out

April 30, 2013 Honolulu 0

THE DIRTY ARMY: WARNING ALL MEN: Laura Marie Hermann goes out with guys, buys them shots, and when they refuse her advances she claims rape on them. Laura Marie thinks she’s a model and role model for others but she has falsified multiple rape charges, dragging multiple families through the mud in this small community. Brothers, fathers, boyfriends, and friends are now forever stigmatized because of this woman. She is a disgrace to ALL women for claiming rape on innocent men. The police are so used to it now that they just dismiss her claims within the week. BEWARE ALL MEN! Laura Marie Hermann is a piece of work and should not be trusted in your home or around your family!

Sounds like another chick who can’t handle her alcohol.- nik

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VP-47′s #1 Slore

March 19, 2013 Honolulu, Navy 116

THE DIRTY ARMY: nik I would like to introduce you to the biggest home wrecking slore that the Navy has ever seen. Her name is Kimberly Briggs and she’s as nasty as the come. She acts like she’s the hottest thing on the planet, and thinks she’s God’s gift to men. She’s horribly mean and has no problem ripping peoples relationships apart, she does it with a smile on her face. Shes a  infested whore and is known to fck anything that walks. She especially has a thing for married guys (found it out the hard way) so to the wives of VP-47 and MCBH, WATCH OUT! Everyone she works with hates her because of how lazy she is, the only reason why anyone puts up with her or looks forward to deployments with this thrash is because they know she’s DTF. The girl has NO standards and even got caught giving head in dirty bunker in Djibouti. She is a serious disgrace to the Navy uniform and females like her are the reason women in the military have such a bad reputation. Please Nik, help me expose her for the person she really is. She’s hurt so many people with her whorish ways, if there is one female that deserves to be blasted it’s her.

Sunscreen will cut down on that wrinkling.- nik

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What Is CJ Miles Doing With All These Trouts

March 11, 2013 Hollywood, Honolulu, The Dirty 124

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this is CJ Miles ” model” from Hawaii who just happens to always be in Hollywood or Vegas or New York with rich trouts and now she is in Dubai for a couple of weeks… Nik what do you think this ” model” is doing there?

If it acts like poop than it probably smells like poop.- nik

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Shakti Stream Ate Colt Brennan Alive

March 8, 2013 Dirty Athletes, Honolulu, The Dirty 36

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this is Shakti Stream. Remember this pro h*e? Back in her ice days she dumped her baseball boyfriend (once it was clear he wasn’t going pro) to date Colt Brennan. Then cheated on Colt (with the baseball player ex boyfriend). This chick see’s a jersey and she goes all spread eagle. Shakti is a straight up home wrecker and pro hoe. Lets not forget she almost killed Colt and a 47 year woman in a head on collision. She was driving an SUV with Colt in the passenger seat when she veered into the other lane and went head on with a little sedan. The woman driving the sedan and Colt both had very severe and life threatening injuries. I’m sure Shakti was hurt too but who cares. She is such a beautiful woman on the outside but such a disgusting ugly person on the inside. This chick can choke on a Greg. Sidenote: Colt Brennan is a douche.

She needs to date a Quarterblack like RG3. That’s where the real money is.- nik

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Danielle Cope Haleiwa Is Bad At Living

January 29, 2013 Honolulu 0

THE DIRTY ARMY: Dear Nik, please expose this chic as the big. I live on the North Shore of Oahu where everyone is friendly and kind and humble. This woman talks down to service staff, doesnt tip and is generally and big, fat saggy ass who’s sense of entitlement is bigger than her beef curtains.. Bigges b*tch on the North Shore. Please help me expose her for what she is…

People who don’t tip tend to be this way.- nik

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