What Do You Think Of Zoella

April 24, 2013 London 106

THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey Nik, this girl is a Youtube “beauty guru”. She makes money by talking to her camera about the stuff she buys. She seems to be pretty full of herself, as she’s always posting pictures of herself and drawing attention to people who tell her she’s pretty. She’s from England and definitely looks like it. I’m thinking it might just be the English dudes that find her hot. So I want to know.. what do you think?

Her smile reminds me of Batman’s enemy. She is a 5.8892881.- nik

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London’s Michelle Keegan Has The Best Body In The World

April 24, 2013 London, The Dirty 83

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this is British celebrity soap-star Michelle Keegan.  I have been following your site for a while and have never seen her posted.  I believe as a girl that this girl has the best body I have ever seen.  Definitely no photoshop, amazing +2′s, ITG and yet has some curves.  Wanted to see how you feel about her.

She is cute in a Kate Middleton with a huge rack kind of way. I could see her being the “nice next door neighbor who has real boobs” type of person.- nik

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Blonde Beauty Rhian Sugden Is A Definite Yes

April 6, 2013 Hollywood, London, The Dirty, Would You? 54

THE DIRTY ARMY: Sup Nik. I found this model and thought she would be worthy for you to look at. I included both real photos and some glamor shots. Would you with Rhian Sugden?  And don’t lie, I got a lot of money riding on the fact you will say you either want pictures for further review, or just a straight up YES.  Click here to see her +2′s.

I have said Yes to her in the past, but she is not aging well and her real boobs are starting to sag. Also, her voice when she talks is worse than David Beckham’s.- nik 

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The Natural’s English Replacement

April 3, 2013 London, The Dirty 36

ENG4 copy

ENG3 copy
THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, here is Rachel from England.  She has all the lads wanting to sank it to her.  Nik, on a Yankee scale where would she land?  Since The Natural is a fake, we need a replacement and Rachel is perfect.

The first image makes me think all British chicks are liars. Second image scales at 2.9985537.- nik

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Aston Martin Can Suck My Balls

March 22, 2013 London, Scottsdale, The Dirty 115


This is absolute bullsh*t. Aston Martin is coming after me for an image that is all over the internet. Luckily my lawyer is better than yours. You just lost a customer.- nik


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Your Thoughts On Lara Jade

March 20, 2013 Hollywood, London 3

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I want to ask you what you think about English photographer Lara Jade.  Many people say she should be in front of the camera instead of being behind it.  Soon as I saw her, you popped into my head and for some reason I totally find her your type.  Whats the verdict on this one?

I wish her hands/palms were smaller. They scare the sh*t out of me.- nik

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Bad News For Fans Of The Natural

March 19, 2013 London, The Dirty 54

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, so bad news DA! The Natural was a fake! Her Twitter was deleted once the friends of the real girl found it! She’s been using the pictures of this young girl (I know the name but I’m not willing to broadcast it on here) and was obviously using the nude pictures of  ‘zoeleecc’ and saying they were the same person! Whoever faked her was obviously the one posting all the stories on here too! Pretty sad that she’s put alot of effort into this charade! Anyway if anything gets posted under the name ‘Harriet Edwards’ on Instagram or Twitter, it is DEFINITELY fake! The real girls name isn’t even close to that! #RIPTheNatural!!!

What’s her real name then? You can’t just leave us hanging like real boobs.- nik

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I Found These Pictures In My Husbands Facebook Account

March 17, 2013 London, The Dirty 166

THE DIRTY ARMY: Dear Nik, so I found these pictures on my husbands Facebook account, I see that he was messaging a woman he use to work with. What shocks me the most is that this woman (Tracee Papolis) even attended our wedding. We are expending a child right now.. and I really can’t emotionally take the thought of even confronting him about this. She is a well known alcoholic and a really big time wh*re who is 40 years old, I don’t even know if this is worth the fight. What should I do?

Do nothing… thank you for coming to me. I think your husband will delete his FB account now (if he cares about his unborn child).- nik

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