THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I have been dating this girl for a few years now. I was going through a bad break up and this girl came around, we hooked up and she literally never left. I had lost my job at the time and only had a low paying internship so I was pretty poor. She moved in fast and helped pay the bills. She had just got out of a relationship too a couple months prior. About a year into our relationship I landed a solid 6 figure career and my income drastically changed to the point I could support us both but she kept working which I respect. The problem was, she hated my success. She always down talked my job and got upset when I bought a nice car that was still well under my budget. Instead of being happy and proud she seemed jealous and resentful and always told me my success would not last, when all I wanted was her support and happiness I was doing well. A lot of times she seems against me and doesnt have my back most of the time when your mate should.
I started catching her texting her ex sometimes, which she downplayed and I accepted her excuses. Then I saw a text she sent after a fight we had saying she still loved him. She said she was upset and just wanted attention from him to make herself feel wanted. I have never cheated or strayed, in fact I stay in every night and few occasions she went out and unexpectedly never come home where she swore she did nothing shady but just hung out with a friend.
We fight because I don’t trust her now, I mean her sleep number is over 40 which seems to be a sign of a promiscuous and untrustworthy woman and she put out really easy and quick for me too. We click really well and think a lot alike and have a lot in common. Lately though, I dont even want to have sex unless I am drunk.
I am at a crossroads now. She is now texting a high school boyfriend and refuses to tell me why. I got sick of it, felt like a paranoid b*tch but I asked her to show me the conversations and she refused to. She is flying home soon without me and it happens to land on our anniversary. I need to know what I should do next with this situation.
Dude… read what you just wrote me, then look in the mirror and slap yourself. Why are in this hellish relationship? Everyday you need to wake up and make yourself happy first, not second, not third… F*cking First! If she does not empower herself on your happiness, then she needs to f*cking go. I hate this girl and I don’t even know her… she made you into a soft soulless man. Time to get yourself back in the game… bang some strange. There is a reason why swimming pools come in all shapes and sizes… swim a little.- nik