December 4, 2013 Los Angeles, Manhattan 11

THE DIRTY ARMY: First of all Nik, let me tell you I’m a huge fan. You’re great, man. Which is why I have come to ask for your advice. This girl right here, she’s driving me fcking crazy. Her name is Daniela Bernal and she lives in New York City. She’s 19 years old. Colombian and Italian. Has the sexiest fcking accent in the world. Anyways, I met her a wild ago and since then this girl cannot leave my mind. I flirt with her and I can’t even tell when she’s flirting because she’s so blunt. I know one of her friends who lives in LA (his name is Troy). He has known her since they were little kids, and he is good friends with her ex, who is this dirty musician, tattooed type of guy (not like me, I’m more of the cut clean type of guy). She’s a free spirit, doesn’t care about shit. Dude, I don’t know what the fck is happening to me. Please help me. How do I convince this girl to be with me? Or how do I get over her? You seem to be pretty blunt, should I just fcking forget about it. BTW, I know you hate tattoos, but don’t judge. This girl to me is amazing and she’s actually fcking interesting when you talk to her. But she’s fcking bad news and I fcking hate her sometimes. She loves fcking with my head. HELP!

Clean cut = a full wallet.  She knows what she’s doing.- nik

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Sergio Monserrate

November 26, 2013 Los Angeles 3

THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey Nik, Just wanted to fill you in on this major douchebag. My friend doesnt have the guts to expose this A-hole but i do! After so many years she still has a lot of pent up anger because she never did anything about the horrible things she endured when they were together. Hey, i get to hear her cry way too often, so i guess this is my way of relief for myself!! Anyways, this douche’s name is Sergio Monserrate. He is from Los Angeles. He is a serial woman beater and child abuser. He is a wannabe actor from LA, which really means he just busses or waits tables and volunteers for Hollywood events hoping he’ll get discovered lol. Not sure how cause his acting is terrible!! Well karma is a bitch and now it’s time people know what hes done. He was with my friend about 8 or some years ago and during their relationship, he beat her constantly (slapping, punching, almost breaking her arm when he dragged her to the floor during one of the fights), as well as abused her kids. He even slammed one of her little boys. The next girl, also suffered a similar fate and after some digging on our part we found out she put him in jail and he was charged with 3 felonies!!! Including assault with a deadly weapon!!! Check out the public record in the attachments!! No joke this guy needs to be locked away and that key needs to be thrown away!! But somehow this predator got off with misdemeanor battery!??! Probably the work of his attorney bro in law. We know that hes dating some aspiring actress named Tara Heston. Actually, we have no idea how this mouse/opossum looking animal scored this chick. Shes not hot by any means but even a 5 is wayyyy out of his league! But then again he preys on women who are at their worst so heyyyy. Just hoping she reads this and keeps herself safe. Anyways, heres another tidbit. Every year he works the LA Latino International Film Festival aka LALIFF. This organization is owned by Edward James Olmos and this Sergio douche is one of the coordinators. I wonder if Edward knows he has a felon who almost killed 2 women working for him??? Please get the word out on this creep. And thanks Nik for all the good reads! Love you and Shayne!

A little old to be hanging around school aren’t we…- nik

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Jo Richard

November 25, 2013 Dirty Craigslist, Los Angeles 17

THE DIRTY ARMY: Jo Richard is a student at Cal State Dominguez in California. I just want to warn you ladies, and some gentleman that this ass is a liar and a dirty whore! He is a member of Phi Beta Sigma Fraternity Incorporated and a unemployed downlow queen. He lies to your face and has unprotected sex with both men and women. He also lives on gays site such as craigstlist, BGC, adam4adam and Jackd. If you were with him I suggest that you get tested and make sure that your body is healthy and that your tests all come back negative! So fuk this depressed DL fag*ot and his kid. He will probably grow up to be a lying, wife beating queen just like his daddy!

Dudes got a forgy figure.- nik

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Did Elle Howard Lie About Her Boob Job

November 25, 2013 Los Angeles, Sydney 12

THE DIRTY ARMY: Okay, Nik. I know you’re pretty much the expert when it comes to +2′s… This is Elle Howard, she is instagram famous and she’s probably been submitted before. Anyways, she is from Australia and lives in Los Angeles right now “modeling” or whatever. She got +2′s a few months back, saying she was going in for surgery to have a lump removed. That might be true, but then she said she needed reconstruction. Maybe it\’s just me but her boobs looks at least three times bigger than they did before, however she still claims it was for health reasons. I understand getting a lump removed but coming out with gigantic boobs afterward? Check out her recent comment about being 32DDD and 420cc.
So, legit health reasons or bullshit excuse to get +2s?

Pretty obvious she had work done.  She uses her hair to cover her refund gap.- ni

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Top Sloot Candidate

November 18, 2013 Los Angeles 7

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik this slooty hoe drools over every man (including mine!) and says she loves her kid but goes out with friends (my bf included)everynight and just flirts and gets guys numbers even though she lives and is supposedly with her baby daddy. even my bf says she flirts with him. she doesnt know how to stay away from other peoples boyfriends and alot of our friends secretly hate her for always having to be the center of attention. if I heard correctly its her parents that always watch her daughter. shes also known for rumors that shes given head to guys shes met at work. nobody wants to tell her anything because she has a really bad attitude and is known for being bitchy and mean. i feel sorry for her bf who thinks shes great but hes just blind to the way she is. she acts like shes in high school shes got my vote for worst mother of the year.

Someone needs to put on some pants in that relationship.- nik

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Thinks She Can Get Anyone

November 15, 2013 Fullerton, Los Angeles 6

THE DIRTY ARMY: nik this fatty jezebel is Janis Soto of fullerton,CA and she is always trying to steal her family members boyfriends and trying to fuck her 25 year old son’s friends when she’s drunk,she’s. So desparate she picks up random homeless men off the street takes them out abuses them n uses them for sex in exchange for money n clothes or pays their phones,shes always with a different man every week.these people hate her so much they smashed out her windows,and have stolen from her cause she likes to steal from people,guys say her vagina smells like rotten sour milk and throws a bitch fit in public if they look in any other direction where theres another female. She’s. A slut that throws herself at other men’s boyfriends at social events infront of her own date ! She thinks shes actually hot shit,and tries to play victim,oh and to top it all off this blimp is actually married !!! And still committing adultry as we speak. Throw an egg if you see this hoe ppl !! His sons friends and her family members are just tired of this whore posted at local bars looking for her next victim to fck over !! Were so over her and grossed out shes a user and an old rusty slut !

Those are some well worked legs.- nik

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Phatty Rapper

November 12, 2013 Los Angeles 1

THE DIRTY ARMY: His name is Jason Geiger but he goes by his rap name “Dirty Phatty”. Kid is one of the biggest scum bags ever and blames his problems on having tourettes. He uses youtube and internet posts to get revenge on people he despises. Well cats out the box now people can now what a scumbag this kid truly is. For the record he’s talked about killing people before so I would stay away from him.

I thought Canadians were the only ones who tried to rap looking like this.- nik

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Proof Drugs Make You Crazy

November 11, 2013 Los Angeles, Manhattan 6

THE DIRTY ARMY: nik this girl is straight up PSYCHO!! her name is ashlin jaffe and she’s from orange county but has lived in LA & NYC. she’s a delusional m*th/h*roin addict who’s ruined her looks with drugs and face injections. each month, she’s something new…a signer with an album coming out, a yoga instructer, a skater, actress that’s gonna be in a movie, i could go on and on. she even goes as far as to steal other peoples instagram pics and post them as her own. like the one with the boobs, that’s porcelain blacks picture. this girl’s “boyfriend” ryan bright, murdered his best friend jenson grey at there santa monica m*th party. wherever ashlin goes she reeks havoc on whatever situation she’s in. anyone she tries to befriend, she ends up fucking over. i almost feel bad posting this, but then i think about how evil, stuck up, fake, mean, obnoxious, pathological, she is and maybe this will be a wake up call. no one can stand to be around this girl, the drama she brings is unimaginable. she also is still with the guy (even tho he’s in jail) that was charged w.murder!! who does that? she’s so into drugs and has been for years she’s completely fried, she needs help

People who have trouble opening their eyes are trouble.- nik

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