THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, huge fan here from Preston across the pond.  Do I got something good for you… Ryan Giggs who is a LEGEND for being one of the best futbolers in Manchester United history.  Recently allegations came out about how he had an 8 year affair with his Brothers wife Natasha, but in all fairness he did start sleeping with Natasha before she was married to his wife… Anyway that affair ended on April 9th and now all these new allegations are coming out about him also having an affair with Big Brother start Imogen Thomas for around 6 months. Ya, crazy story right Nik?  Do you think we should forgive him because of the amazing futbol career he has had for us?  I mean he is such a legend even his wife has not broke up with him.

I already forgive him. He is Ryan Giggs, he can do whatever he wants. Any father would be proud to let his Greg penetrate their daughter.- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this is Michelle Keegan, she’s a British actress. I’m a girl and I think she is gorgeous! Killer body. Would you?  And please be honest with us.  We love your american honesty Nik.

Answer: No, we have our own American actress who look just like her named Jwoww. Honestly the implant issues Michelle Keegan has concern me. Curious, is her father Kevin? If it is I might be willing to give her my bastard (which will be spinned to create a boy).

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, Sasha Jackson is apparently a British actress, but I have never heard of her. Either way here is a smokin hot pictures of her in Miami. So, lets hear it Nik, would you?

Answer: Not quite sure… from this image I can smell a REFUND Gap. Why is everyone hyping this girl up so much? No ass!

THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey Nik, don’t have a clue who this chick is, possibly called ‘Lexi’, but what a way to RUIN a decent body and face. These are possibly the worst +2s (minus twos?) I’ve seen, total hack job! I wouldn’t be posing happily like that with those two rock hard looking tittays on my chest, not even mentioning the refund gap… I’m not even going to ask would you, but Nik why does she seem happy to flaunt such melons?

I hate +2′s that look forced. If they don’t move when you shag, what’s the point?- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I found your brunette. I was searching the web just now and found her and immediately thought of you. She’s from England and will be a judge on the new season of x-factor. She’s a big time model, Singer and all around star in England and her name is Cheryl Cole. She was voted by FHM as the Sexiest Woman In The World (think Maxim’s Hot 100) in both 2009 and 2010, and has been winning prizes left and right since she first came onto the scene in 2002. I’m really picky and can’t find a flaw she’s absolutely gorgeous. So the question is would you? And is she the one?

I know Cheryl well… she is not the one.- nik