11.05.09

Tony Soprano: “I’m Gonna Break Yo F*cken Face!”

I knew Tony Soprano was a real character and not some hack actor.


Nik Richie

11.05.09

Yanks Manager Girardi Aids Crash Victim

Posted in Manhattan, The Dirty

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THE DIRTY ARMY:  EASTCHESTER - On his way home from winning the World Series, Yankees Manager Joe Girardi stopped to help a woman who had lost control of her car on the Cross County Parkway and crashed into a wall.

“The guy wins the World Series, what does he do? He stops to help,” said Westchester County police officer Kathleen Cristiano, who was among the first to arrive at the accident scene. “It was totally surreal.”

The driver was stunned by the accident, but otherwise uninjured, police said.

The crash happened at 2:25 a.m. today on the eastbound lanes along a long blind curve where the Cross County meets the Hutchinson River Parkway prior to the New Rochelle Road exit, police said.

Click Here To Read More

Good looking out Joe, congrats on 27.- nik


Nik Richie

11.05.09

**Update** What Did You Have For Dinner Last Friday Night…?

Posted in Manhattan, The Dirty

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, since we were in town for the upcoming Yankee games we decided to splurge.  You should have came, the owner said you were in town.

Something about having dinner with 6 dudes doesn’t really do it for me.  Nello’s is the bomb though.  Maybe next time I will hang… when the economy is a little bit more stable.- nik

**Update**- This receipt was from a lunch from Russian Billionaire Roman Abramovich not Eric Medrano from Dallas, TX which is the poser who fronted as the submitter.  Sorry for the misunderstanding… I don’t check other blogs that is why I have the Army.


Nik Richie

11.04.09

Leper On Tyra

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I saw Leper on Tyra Show today, she pulled out her fake two front teeth along with her friend Heather who also has a flipper. Guess she wasnt making all of that stuff up after all huh? She was saying how she wants to make a change in her life and stop drinking and putting herself in these bad situations, but look at her most recent pics, do you think she’ll ever wake up and realize she needs to change her lifestyle? Moving to a different city isnt going to change the way she lives.

I am sure someone in the DIRTY ARMY recorded this??  I want screenshots… I heard her face looked fat on TV.- nik


Nik Richie

11.04.09

Gentle Rapist’s Touch

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THE DIRTY ARMY:  Nik, New York’s finest.  Q-ball has a gentle rapist’s touch.

You know they will be touching girls tonight if the Yankees win!!- nik


Nik Richie

11.04.09

Tucker Max Is A Patho

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Tucker Max real SGM?

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this is Tucker Max author of bestselling “I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell”.  I think it is time for the dirty army to reveal the mystery chick.

Wow, does Chelsea Handler know he stole her likeness… well I guess he didn’t considering he cut out her face on his book?  I would have used a brown bag, but whatever.  Don’t ask me if I read his book either because I don’t know how to read.- nik

**You know that chick with the tat is probably beat as hell.


Nik Richie

11.04.09

To My Boys!!!

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Just wanted to say Go Yankees!  xxoo!- Kaden Solo

Good job Kaden… you probably just jinxed it. Thanks.- nik

[Image: HexedMedia]


Nik Richie

11.02.09

Major Douche Alert

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, couldnt help but submit this douche. George, also goes by the name “G-Star” a up and coming “reality tv star” in the NYC area takes douche to a whole nother level. Girls go crazy for him, and he sleeps anything that walks. He’s also been known to be a cougar hunter doing plenty of women over the age of 50! We all love milfs but come on!? Am I the only one who finds this disturbing. Hes 23. He really thinks hes the sh*t with his “rockstar glam style” but doing grannys really isnt cool. He also loves blonde girls with overdone plastic surgery and a few of them looked like or may have been dudes. Tool.

Can someone tell me what the Gotti kids do now?  I need to tell the masses how they have become losers in life!  The virus needs to stop.- nik

**Maybe I am Link from the Legend of Zelda and I must go to Jersey to eliminate the host?  Someone needs to save the world… I think I can do it.


Nik Richie

11.02.09

A Busy November For Elvira

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey Nik.. Is Elvira becoming an escort??

I wouldn’t doubt it in this economy.- nik


Nik Richie

10.31.09

Fat Crack

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this is Courtney the Mac forcefield troll.  She thinks she is a princess, she treats girls like crap and thinks every guy she talks to loves her.  She lives like a slob which is probably why she never brings guys to her place but she certainly doesn’t stay there much she is always sleeping at some dudes house.  She has met random dudes and will end up staying at their house with them for a few days and then never talk to then again.  B*tch be crazy, she goes through guys like she guys through make-up, actually I take that back those last to long more like as often as she puts it on.  Nik this girl looks like a troll but thinks she is some beauty queen, lets bring her down from her little fairy land.

It blows my mind that someone could sleep with that.- nik


Nik Richie


 

 

 

 

 
 

 

 

 

 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 

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+2 Factor: when a chick gets a boob job it increases her value two points on a ten point scale

+2's: fake boobs

30k Milli: a guy who claims he make millions, but really only make around $30k a year and spends all his money on stuff he can't afford; a poser

6 head (5 head): when a person has a enormous forehead (measured in inches)

Affliction: a brand of clothing worn by losers

Afro-Brow: hairy eyebrows

Air biscuit: fart

Anti-petite: no way near small

Aquaf*gs: underwater f*gs

Babushka: a big giant, Harlem Globetrotter-like afro, that explodes out of the panties of a Crabby Patty when panty security has been breached

Beak: Nose like a large bird

Beat: disgustingly ugly

Bissues: b*tch with issues

Blanimal: A black animal

Blast (putting someone on blast): putting someone in the spotlight and/or exposing them; talking crap about someone

Bucket Seats: nice ass

Butterface: everything looks good, but her face

Cadirack: not easy on the eyes, an eye sore

Caker: chick who wears way too much makeup

Cannibal: a lesbian. Because they eat their own kind

Car-Tastrophe: beat looking people in a car

Ceptor head: looks good except her head

Cheesecake: real fruity guy

Chubble: problems fat people cause.

Combustible Cougar: horny for young men

Combustible face: Hazardous look

Cougar in Training (Baby Cougar): a girl who will grow up to be a Cougar because her mom is one and/or she is starting to look and act like one

Cougars: women who are 40 or older who try to be 20 (by getting plastic surgery, wearing tons of makeup, dressing like they are 20, etc) and usually date or "prey" on younger men

Cougar-Troll: an ugly cougar

Cougarville: place where cougars come from

Cougarwood: place where famous cougars go

Cougrrrr: Very ugly cougar

Count gutula: big stomach

Crabby Patty: p*ssy

Crash test dummy: a dumb friend that you can convince to do anything

Dale Boy (Dales): a guy who claims to be straight but acts like he's gay (or really is just gay)

D-Bagalicious: sensational D-bag

D-Bag: Douche bag; someone who sucks at life; a total jerk

Dirty Army: the group of people who are fans of thedirty.com

Dirty Bird: dirty/sl*tty British chick

Don: a young female gold digger looking for a new wealthy father or sugar daddy

Douchetard: douche + retard

Drag Hag: someone who hangs with drag queens

DSL's: D*ck sucking lips

Dugout Driller: aggressive gay guy

Egg Roll(s): fat Asians

F*gadocious: super gay

F*gtastic: overly gay

F*gtician: professional f*gs

Fake SGM: people who are not in the Scissor Gang Mafia but pretend to be by giving the scissor gang sign in pictures (and NIk will point out the reason why they are not cool enough to be in it)

Fanny Pack's : beat girls that have no appeal

Farm: a person's ass

Fattastrophe: group of very fat people

Fifty cake mistake: big girl who loves cake

Fifty Yarder: only looks good from fifty yards away

File You Away: putting a hot guy/girl (whatever works for ya) in your mental hard drive so you can masturbate to them later

Flesbian: Fake lesbian

Forgy: Short for, "For the gays"

Frat Rat: a girl who loves to hang out with and/or screw guys in fraternities

Freetard: a free retard

Front Grill: teeth

F*ck Trophy: baby/kid..."What bout that chick you met at the club the other night, did you hit that?" "Naw she's got a f*ck trophy."

Fugly: f*cking ugly

FUPA: a fat upper pu**y area. Men can have it too.

Gaysian: a gay Asian.

Gestappo's : those who oppose the dirty army

Gills: side fat; love-handles

Grave Diggaz: dirty nails

Grazer: chick that likes to eat a lot

Green Bay: cellulite; cottage cheese

Gregalicious: Owns a greg

Greg-Juice: self explanatory

Greg: penis; tummy stick

Helmet Special: retard

Himstitute: tranny prostitute

Hoemerican: an American hoe

Horses (or any reference to a horse, stable, the derby, races or horse names): people with huge teeth and gums that resemble those of a horse

Insurgents: non SGM perpetrator/ enemies of the army

Jack Bauer: a person with a large fore head or a twenty forehead

Jay Leno: got a big chin

Kodiak: body of a bear

Lee push up bra: from the makers of lee press on nails

Long Head Clan: horse division ( horse head)

Lotto Baby: unknown father (a lot-of people hit that)

MAC Forcefield: tons and tons of makeup that looks clown-like

Mad Monkey: extremely drunk & out of control

Mick Jagger's : Big lips

Muffin Top: when a person's side or stomach fat bubbles over their waistband because their pants are too tight, forming the shape of a muffin

Multichin: multiple chins

Multi-Gregging: Gang bang on one chick

Nominee: person with no money

Nomo's: a place where no homo's are welcome

Noodles: referring to Asian people or descent

Nostrildahmus: Huge nose pipes

Onion: nice a$$

Oscar Myer: Got a Greg

Pack of franks: fat rolls on a chicks body..."Damn! look at the pack of franks on that chic"

Paki house/hut: liquor store

Patch Adams: balding

Pearl catcher: chicks who get c*mmed on

Pebbles: an attractive, yet underage and overly sexual young girl. (aka jailbait)

Pepperidge Farm: way too old

PGM ("Pinky Gang Mafia"): the rival gang of SGM whose members show their pinky finger when having a picture taken

Pickle Smoocher: rubs the Greg

Pig Fishing: guys who are out to just f*ck anything

Pirate: gay dude. Because they like semen on their poop deck

Poon lagoon: pu**y

Prop 8: gay person who wants to get married

Prosthetic Playa: fake wanna be player

Puffydumbbell: roid user

Purple Crayon: A black man's Gregr

Raisinets: ugly nipples

Red Cup Nation: those of us who agree that only red plastic cups should be used at parties (because all other colors are stupid)

Refund Gap: the huge gap between some women's fake boobs that is so big that they should get their money back from their doctor

Ronald Mcdonalds: High arching eyebrows

RVM: red vest mafia: Valet attendant

Sevenhead: means "Yes I ride the Short Bus!"

Sewerfront: Waterfront in Scottsdale

SGM ("Scissor Gang Mafia"): people who make a scissor/backward peace sign when having their picture taken

She-Boys: Trannys

Shim: a girl who looks like a man

Shimspital: hospital for shims

Shman: female type of man

Shopping Bags: droopy boob job or +2'S

Shotgun: a slutty chick. One cock and she's ready to blow

Shougar: a girl that is a cougar and a shim

Skankaholic: addicted to or being a skank; likes skanky chicks; an alcoholic skank

Ski Jumper: big or long nose

Slant F*cker: guy who only likes f*ckin asian chicks

Slim Slow Diet: a fat person who feels it necessary to show people her body..."Sick, see that fat girl in the bikini? Oh, she is feeling good about herself since she just got on the Slim Slow Diet."

Sloon: a chick that looks like she's mixed with snake lizard and baboon

Slug: Ugly slut

Snicker Licker: White girls who only like black guys

Soldier: a member of the Dirty Army; a fan/supporter of thedirty.com

Sorostitute: a girl in a sorority that is easier than a prostitute

Sphere Job: a boob job

Spongebob: a nasty female that has a crabby patty instead of a vagina

A Stallone: a really ugly Italian chick (or any chick for that matter)

Stay Puff: juice-muscular guy obviously on roids

Stretch Armstrong: face lift too tight

Sugar butt: a gay guy

Summer Teeth: some are here, some are there

Superhighway Gap: boobs miles apart

Synchronized Sucking : what aqua f*gs do

Talons: ugly toes

Tenderfoot: gay or feminine

Thunderstorm: extremely large thighs; thunder thighs

Too Fat Shakur:2-pac fat reference

Top Romin : a person that is broke

Tranimal: animal tranny

Tranny: a girl with so much makeup caked on her face that she looks like a transvestite

Tri-Tip: she can try the tip

Troff Feeder: an obese female

Trout: an older man who dates younger women in trying to be younger or "swim upstream"

Trout Mouth: looks like a fish

Tuna Factory: chick who has nasty lookin p*ssy lips..."That chicks gotta tuna factory goin on down there."

Unbeweavable: lots of weave

WNBA: a tall female who is manly

Would You?: means "would you screw this chick?"