THE DIRTY ARMY: Remember that old Eddie Murphy joke about Aunt Bunny, the bigfoot? Well, I met one of her kids. Her escort name is Electra of the Montreal escort agency, book-herself. She is also known by the names Imane Chaa, Imane Lechat and Zarah. This girl had so many hairs sticking out of her chest tattoo that I had to question whether or not the tattoo was shaved hair or ink. She also had tonnes of hair on her arms, back and butt. Shaved bigfoot. Then there was the smell. I could smell her ass standing facing her or maybe it was just her breath, but she needs a lot of mouth wash and soap. She also needs to stop eating fresh fish out of the local rivers as she tours across Canada as an escort. Also, she’s looking to get a nose job to shave done her gonzo from the Muppet show like beak in Los Angeles. Save the money you’re making as an escort to put towards regular laser hair removal before people figure out your secret as a shaved bigfoot. Goonie goo goo.