Newport | Nik Richie + Dirty Army intel, opinions, gossip, satire, and celebrities - Part 3

My Stepford Wife Life

October 24, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 38

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(Click on the image to see this “Stepford Wife’s” +2′s… thoughts?)

THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey Nik! Thanks so much for cluing me in to this alternate universe. All my life all I have wanted to be was a faithful wife. I’m extremely attractive, largely because of plastic surgery guide lines from you! Anyway, never really meant to be a gold digger but now I have an Ivy league education and I just want to be a sexy Newport mom. I understand I’ll be replaced in ten years but I promise to make those ten years the most amazing sex filled blow job years of his life. So what now Nik you judgmental prick? Never mind won’t be checking back just making naked sandwiches while I give my husband a blow job.

Katie, why are you sending me naked pictures of yourself? I’m already taken.- nik



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Which One Is It

October 22, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 34

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I just read on tamra barnys Facebook that one of Lynne’s daughters is pregnant. Last I knew they were both hardcore ravers who both were taking off their clothes for money. I can’t seem to find anything about which one is pregnant since Tamra mentioned the daughter is due next month!?

Looks like someones Porn career just ended.- nik



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Joselyn Cano’s Butt Injection Scars

October 20, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 138

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, did anyone else notice the two dots (injection scars?) below Joselyn’s butt in her IG photo? What can it be Nik?

Maybe she is growing nipples for future surgeries.- nik



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“Coming Out Day” Turned Me Gay

October 16, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 226

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THE DIRTY ARMY:  Nik, I read to story on your blog about “Coming Out Day” at high schools, and I felt the need to share my story.  I was a 14 year old Freshman, I was very goofy but who isn’t at 14.   I got picked on a lot and it really hurt.  I ended up making friends with the “outcasts” and pretty much hated high school.  We had “coming out day” and 2 kids I was friends with came out of the closet and all the sudden they went from getting picked on to being heroes.  All that jocks that picked on them the week before, were high fiving them and inviting them to cool parties, while I kept on getting picked on.  I saw how everyone treated the gay kids, so I decided my Sophmore year I would “come out” even though I wasn’t gay.  I endured a lot more bullying but when I “came out” my sophomore year it was the best.  Everyone that bullied me stopped and became my friend, everyone said I was so brave and so cool for admitting I was gay.  I started hanging out with all the gay kids and the peer pressure got to me.  I eventually ended up giving 3 blow jobs to senior guys even though I didn’t want to, but in my head blowing 3 guys was nothing compared to how lonely and bullied I was.  To me it was worth it.  My junior year I was sexually active and had sex with several other students, again, I didn’t want to but I was forced to, I didn’t wanna go back to eating lunch by myself and always staying at home because no one wanted to be my friend.  During my senior year I really thought I was gay, I had a boyfriend.  I had accepted it, I’m gay, I love me and I love penis but 2 years after high school, I’m so f*cked in the head.  Everyone thinks I’m gay, but I’m not.  I want to date girls in my town, but they all see me as their bestfriend and when I tell them I’m not gay, they tell me I’m confused.  I just want to yell at them “No you stupid b*tch, I’m straight, I was gay so I could get through high school” at the end of the day, I would much rather have spent 4 years being irrelevant and picked on rather then where I am now.  I don’t have gay bone in my body. So my take “Coming Out Day” should be banned from all schools, at 14 we are way too young to understand that concept.

Thank you for sharing your story with us. That takes a lot of courage.- nik

ALSO SEE:

I Don’t Know How I Feel About “Coming Out Day”



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I Don’t Know How I Feel About “Coming Out Day”

October 10, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 185

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, looking at high schools for my boy since he is going to be a Freshman in 2016.  This is Sage High School, its a private school off the 73 and suppose to be top notch.  Well, they have an actual “coming out day” where gay kids can come out and not have to worry about being bullied and looked at different.  But I feel like it encourages kids to be gay, you don’t know what you are at 15… what if this makes a straight kid gay?  Would you send Press to a school like this?

Why would a high school promote sexuality? That is just weird. Sage is cut for me. Save this kind of stuff for college.- nik



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Real Sexy Barbie Married The Swallow King

October 9, 2014 Las Vegas, Newport, The Dirty 52

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, finally Realsexibarbie got married to that Douchebag Swallow King in Vegas… Please be prepared to that Divorce in like 3 Months.  And lets not hope they have a child… it would be a disaster for the human race.

She looks pregnant already.- nik



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Why I Joined The Dirty Army

October 9, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 145

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, as a huge fan of yours, I wanted to let you know that I really appreciate what you’re doing here. Your site functions as a counterbalance to all the lies and bullsh*t beta males do and tell women in order for them to gain favor or appeal. The criticism you give is impartial, and isn’t laced with desperation or artificial admiration that stems from personal insecurities. You cut through all the bullsh*t, and grace us with the truth, and for that my friend, I thank you. Every guy should recognize the great service you’re providing. Unfortunately, we live in a world where women are systematically trying to strip guys of their confidence, emasculate them, make them feel inferior, take advantage of them, and deceive them. We need a voice like yours to poke holes in the inflated egos of these perps. We need you to tame their arrogance. Show the flaws and deficiencies in their facade of perfection. Today I make a solemn pledge that my allegiance will always be to The Dirtty and everything it stands for. Long live the Alpha Male and Nik Richie aka “Our Fearless Leader”!!!

Thank you.- nik



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Fake Ass Hustler

October 7, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 97

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, so this little fruitloop thinks he’s some kind of hustler trying to sell all these watches, glasses, belts, handbags, etc. to people as a living. I met this sperm reject through a mutual friend when I was in the market for a high end watch. So I met up with him and bought one of his “watches” for a “good deal” he said. I know it’s partially my fault for not having it appraised by a real jeweler, but thought my boy knows him so he’s got to be legit. Turns out my piece is fake and now this f*ck tard is no where to be found. If I get a hold of this clown I’mma ring his tiny neck!!!! Guess it runs in the family as his sister is a wanna be escort that got fired from Equinox.

Please be from Iraq. All these Iranian hustlers in the OC are bringing the real entrepreneurs down.- nik



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