Nik, Please Help

September 6, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 169

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this girl is from Newport and I follow her on Instagram. I know nothing about her except her name is Giselle and I think she is perfect. Does anyone in the dirty army know anything about her? Please help me! I’m dying to know!!!

Screw this guy.  Nik, I don’t ask for much.  Just get me a date with this girl. –  JV

JV she is like 45 years old in the face. You don’t want this life.- nik



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I Wish Times Were Different

September 1, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 80

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, remember back in the day when people would “freak” at dances/concerts?  It was so easy to get laid back then, the music would come on and everyone would start dancing and getting crazy. You would be able to get the girls so wet by grinding your boner on them… it was easy.  Now you go see a DJ, no one is dancing together, you are just rolling your f*cking balls off and raising your hands bouncing in one place… and if you wanna get laid?  You better be able to pony up 500 bucks or be ready for a long night of poppin molly and trying to stay up the latest with a girl and then maybe, maybe you get laid.

Bottle service ruined everything. I would freak on chicks so hard back in the day.- nik



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Spanish Nanny Is A Fake

August 30, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 59

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THE DIRTY ARMY:  Nik, despite all the implants and surgery Spanish Nanny has, she even wears padding in her clothing? Look at the padding on her hip. Maybe some of her Johns can fork out some money for some more real implants under the skin?

She needs to stop getting work done to her body… Spanish Nanny let the plastic breathe a little.- nik



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Potential Sugar Mama For JV

August 29, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 97

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(Click here to Enlarge and read Email)

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I wanted to inquire about your employee Junior Varsity. I have been looking for a boytoy for a while, but cannot find one that is sexual enough to handle what I need or should I say what we need. I need a young man to take me to dinners, be with me for shopping sprees and traveling on vacations when needed, because my husband at times is doing the same with his mistress, so therefore I need company too. I’m 44, have a petite figure and really nice and perky fake boobs. I’m willing to pay JV an allowance of 2,000 per week, some weeks I need him 2 or 3 nights and sometimes I will not need his presence at all. But he has to be ok with 1 thing and 1 thing only. He has to be ok with my husband video taping and watching JV and I have sex. My husband is a voyeur and wants to watch me having sex with JV and getting off. He doesn’t sit in the same room as us, he will be in the next room watching us having sex through a camera feed we have set up in our sex room. If JV can handle me and is ok with my husband pleasing himself to us having sex… then please give him my contact and set up an interview. Thank you and hope he is the one.

Cool, let me ask him. He’s into weird sh*t so I don’t see this being a problem.- nik



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It’s Cheaper Than Dating

August 26, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 374

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I’m sure my fellow “Dirty Army” brothers in Newport and surrounding areas can agree on just how BAD the traditional dating scene has become. I’m tired of meeting uneducated, minimum wage earning “6-7′s” (who think they’re dimes) from broken homes with no hope, no future. I’m tired of risking my life driving to the heart of Costa Mesa to pick them up, feeding them a meal they can’t afford, and watching them talk with their mouths open. So where have I been finding “release”? Meet Nathasha Knightly aka Naughty Natasha! For a mere $200 (for 30 minutes), she will fulfill your every desire! I used to loathe those who pay for love but in reality, what’s the difference? We ALL pay for meals, drinks, movies! We drop $200 on gas, dinner and a movie and if we’re lucky, we get to second base? Why not be assured of a grand slam on the VERY first meeting? It’s much more “cost effective” and the girls are WAY better looking on Humaniplex than Javier’s!

Her body is real though.- nik



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Men And Tinder

August 26, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 58

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years a few months back over some stupid he said she said. We didn’t speak for a few weeks but since then we have been hanging out every weekend. Which is ironic because we never spent a lot of alone time while we were together it was always work events and bars. But the other day at dinner I was closing apps of his phone and saw Tinder (The funny part is his tinder Bio is the bio I wrote for him on Instagram…real original) . I made a comment about him meeting girls on tinder and he told me he never uses it….OKAY! Please explain to me why a good looking successful man who still has sex with his ex-girlfriend all the time needs to find girls on Tinder? Do you think he still has sex and asks me to stay the weekend because he still loves me? Or is he just looking for sex where ever he can find it? I need help!!! I love him but I don’t want to waste time if I’m just getting played! I’m 8 years younger and I don’t want to watch my prime slip by me.

Don’t trust any man who has Tinder. It is a sex application.- nik



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Women Getting Paid Less For Same Work

August 22, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 83

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I read a fascinating article about how hookers are making 20% less than a few years ago for the same “work”.  The girls on average are making $260 currently per John, the average 7 years ago was over $380.  Not too long from now I figure we may see Steve Madden coming out with red-bottoms as a more affordable alternative.

I know a guy who bought this girl a pair of Red Bottoms in exchange for 7 sessions of intercourse. I feel like he got ripped off.- nik



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I Need Clarification On A Situation I Was In

August 20, 2014 Newport, The Dirty 424

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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, so I was at Sharkeez in Newport on a Tuesday night, having a great time and getting wasted.  So this song comes on by Future called “Move That Dope”, everyone is feeling it and singing along… the hook goes “Young n*gga move that dope, Young n*gga move that dope, They move that dope, they move that dope, Young n*gga move that dope”… everyone was singing along, then this black guy that was next to me looks at me and says I can’t be saying that!!!  I wasn’t calling anyone the N word, I was simply singing along with one of my favorite songs.  I’m confused on this because all I do is listen to rap and I don’t have a racist bone in my body.  Am I suppose to sing the song but not say some of the lyrics?  I’m sure black guys have no problem saying Cracker when they are listening to Rick Ross or any other racist rapper.  Everyone in the DA put down a comment, I want to see how everyone feels about this.  Because at the end of the day, when I use to word n*gga with my boys, its a term of endearment.

You shouldn’t be saying that word. Seriously when the chorus hits, shut your mouth.- nik



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