THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this boy is the definition of douche. He chats up girls on facebook, begs them to comment his pictures and texts them 24/7. He is like a f*cking child in the way he acts and the way he talks. He asked me how tall i was, if i liked italian boys and if i drive, ALL IN THE SAME SENTENCE. I went over to his house, he smelled like wet dog and piss and just pure nastiness. He answered the door in his sweats, like a douche. Took a shower, like a douche, and it didn’t even help. His room smelled like douche and piss. He didn’t grab my boob, he poked it and then giggled like a boy whos never felt a tit. we watched a movie in his room, the hot chick. why would a guy even own that? I was going to blow him, but we didn’t even get that far. I put it in my hand and he jizzed everywhere after like literally 5 seconds. It was disgusting, he jizzed on my phone. I had had enough, so i left with my jizz covered phone when he asked for a hug, while he was still hanging out and covered in his own oregano italian smelling cream. He then proceeded to cancel his house party he was going to have that night because his mom was “trippin balls”. Thats right, f*ckface lives at home. Ladies, keep away from this douche unless you want a sticky phone and want to feel like you just got done babysitting and get nothing for it. not even a drink.

I think every day he just gets dumber and dumber, I can tell he has no brain capacity left.- nik