THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this here is Franky Petersen. She’s a real 5 star riot. Kind of reminds me of the girlfriend I had when I was 16, was horrible in the sack, and only cost $10 to take out. But there’s a 99% chance this girl will sleep with you on the first two (usually first) date. She thinks she’s so fancy because her father is “Mr. Fremont” with his D level solar and roofing company. Girl has serious mental issues too. She thinks she’s using men to get stuff, when in reality, it’s a cheap bottle of red, a pounding in the sheets, then dropping her off at home. At least that’s how I treated it. And don’t let the makeup fool you, if Adam Levine met this broad, he’d be hurling Proactiv at her.