11.06.09

Slugs

Slugs

 

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, These two girls roam the bay area making skantaly clad apperances at 944.com parties, and updating their twitter with tweets such as, “My life is so hectic, there is a reality show in the making..” BARF They fuck D list celebrities such a everyone in The Pack, I just need to know.. would you?

Answer:No, are you kidding me? They are total shims, and their armpits gross me out.

 


Nik Richie

11.04.09

Mack Of The Year

259369086_l-copy

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik how did your boy do? Would you with either of these fine ass promo girls?

Answer: No, they are both trashy, and not to mention obese.- nik


Nik Richie

11.04.09

Join Our Party

31213282_l-copy

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik they thought wearing the glasses would not make this shot forgy…definitely not the case..wait a second, Nik is that you and Ari Golden pre-partying in your room??

No, I am darker and my agent Ari is fatter.- nik


Nik Richie

11.03.09

Jose Canseco Still Getting Tail

jose canseco still getting tail

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, looks like jose canseco still gets chicks even though he is old, broke and is known for having shrunken junk. Nik why do chicks still dig this guy i mean its been 20yrs since he was good at baseball.

I wonder what kind of oil he uses for his chest?  I am guessing something with a lavender scent.- nik


Nik Richie

10.26.09

TheDirty & Beverly Hills Royalty Hollywood Halloween Bash

bhph-flyrer

TheDirty and Beverly Hills Royalty are throwing their second annual “Orange Carpet Event” at club MyHouse in Hollywood. Celebrity DJ Rob Patterson and Playboy’s 50th Anniversary Playmate (Worlds sexiest DJ) Colleen Shannon on the Decks all night with a Special performance by the Master of Ceremonies himself, Mickey Avalon.


Click HERE to buy your tickets!


Please send any questions to Rock@TheDirty.com


Nik Richie

10.14.09

+2 Advice

Posted in San Francisco

+2 Advice

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, ok so I have more of a question than some dirt, and since I know you are the +2 expert I figured you could help. So I unfortunately have natural big boobs (future saggers) and I want to get them done before my breast tissue is ruined! Is there any way to get them lifted without getting gnarley scars or do I just live with the scars? Please help Nik!

Be comfortable with who you are.  Only do it if it make you feel better and not others.  My opinion is my opinion not yours.- nik


Nik Richie

10.07.09

Love Fest In San Fran

Posted in San Francisco

23-copy2

THE DIRTY ARMY:  Nik, I guess Sundae in SF had a float that he worked on and he thing and he wont shut up about this thing that I call a dude, he swears its a chick……..No chick has abs like that… nik please help him out here.

You gotta love San Fran spirit.  Nice abs dude.- nik


Nik Richie

10.06.09

What Gut?

Posted in San Francisco

What gut?

What gut?

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, Gut? What gut? This girl has a perfect body. Her face may not be what everyone likes but everyone can all agree they would blow one on her t*ts. Here are some more pics of her. Couldn’t find any good blond pics.

She does have a gut, but her saggers hang so low tha they block it.- nik


Nik Richie

10.02.09

Cheap Trick

Cheap Trick

Cheap Trick

THE DIRTY ARMY: Most of the time Lauren smells like cheap vodka but she always smells like fish. I believe Lauren invented herpes because of all the fungus growing on her yellow teeth. You would stick it in to feel around right?

That is gross.  Only dirty girls would think of going out while rocking the herps.-nik


Nik Richie

09.29.09

Worried About My Friend

1nicksf

1nicksf2

THE DIRTY ARMY:  Nik, I really need your help on this one.  This is my buddy Nick from socal, he has been acting really weird lately and I am kind of concerned.  He lives in Newport and for some reason when we go out he never talks to any girls, he just always wants to hang with the bros and constantly pat us on the back.  He touched my lower back once saying I wasn’t standing up straight at Rudy’s and kind of massaged it.  Well anyway to make a long story short he has been depressed lately and said he needed to take a trip somewhere to find himself.  So he has been in San Fransico for ten days now and texted me these pictures.  I am not one to judge because he was on my flag football team and could not catch a football, but do you think he is for the Gays? Should I confront him on it?

Honestly dude, look at the way he grips that hard steel railing and what man smiles when he climbs mountains?  He left you Cass (sorry had to name drop) because he was in love with you and didn’t know how to tell you.  You need to make that decision before he finds someone else in SF and you lose your security deposit.  I know you guys are great friends that have already lived together for years.  Just try it.  Just the tip.  Just to see how is smells.- nik 


Nik Richie


 

 

 

 

 
 

 

 

 

 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 

back forward

 

 

 

 

 
 

 

 

 

 

+2 Factor: when a chick gets a boob job it increases her value two points on a ten point scale

+2's: fake boobs

30k Milli: a guy who claims he make millions, but really only make around $30k a year and spends all his money on stuff he can't afford; a poser

6 head (5 head): when a person has a enormous forehead (measured in inches)

Affliction: a brand of clothing worn by losers

Afro-Brow: hairy eyebrows

Air biscuit: fart

Anti-petite: no way near small

Aquaf*gs: underwater f*gs

Babushka: a big giant, Harlem Globetrotter-like afro, that explodes out of the panties of a Crabby Patty when panty security has been breached

Beak: Nose like a large bird

Beat: disgustingly ugly

Bissues: b*tch with issues

Blanimal: A black animal

Blast (putting someone on blast): putting someone in the spotlight and/or exposing them; talking crap about someone

Bucket Seats: nice ass

Butterface: everything looks good, but her face

Cadirack: not easy on the eyes, an eye sore

Caker: chick who wears way too much makeup

Cannibal: a lesbian. Because they eat their own kind

Car-Tastrophe: beat looking people in a car

Ceptor head: looks good except her head

Cheesecake: real fruity guy

Chubble: problems fat people cause.

Combustible Cougar: horny for young men

Combustible face: Hazardous look

Cougar in Training (Baby Cougar): a girl who will grow up to be a Cougar because her mom is one and/or she is starting to look and act like one

Cougars: women who are 40 or older who try to be 20 (by getting plastic surgery, wearing tons of makeup, dressing like they are 20, etc) and usually date or "prey" on younger men

Cougar-Troll: an ugly cougar

Cougarville: place where cougars come from

Cougarwood: place where famous cougars go

Cougrrrr: Very ugly cougar

Count gutula: big stomach

Crabby Patty: p*ssy

Crash test dummy: a dumb friend that you can convince to do anything

Dale Boy (Dales): a guy who claims to be straight but acts like he's gay (or really is just gay)

D-Bagalicious: sensational D-bag

D-Bag: Douche bag; someone who sucks at life; a total jerk

Dirty Army: the group of people who are fans of thedirty.com

Dirty Bird: dirty/sl*tty British chick

Don: a young female gold digger looking for a new wealthy father or sugar daddy

Douchetard: douche + retard

Drag Hag: someone who hangs with drag queens

DSL's: D*ck sucking lips

Dugout Driller: aggressive gay guy

Egg Roll(s): fat Asians

F*gadocious: super gay

F*gtastic: overly gay

F*gtician: professional f*gs

Fake SGM: people who are not in the Scissor Gang Mafia but pretend to be by giving the scissor gang sign in pictures (and NIk will point out the reason why they are not cool enough to be in it)

Fanny Pack's : beat girls that have no appeal

Farm: a person's ass

Fattastrophe: group of very fat people

Fifty cake mistake: big girl who loves cake

Fifty Yarder: only looks good from fifty yards away

File You Away: putting a hot guy/girl (whatever works for ya) in your mental hard drive so you can masturbate to them later

Flesbian: Fake lesbian

Forgy: Short for, "For the gays"

Frat Rat: a girl who loves to hang out with and/or screw guys in fraternities

Freetard: a free retard

Front Grill: teeth

F*ck Trophy: baby/kid..."What bout that chick you met at the club the other night, did you hit that?" "Naw she's got a f*ck trophy."

Fugly: f*cking ugly

FUPA: a fat upper pu**y area. Men can have it too.

Gaysian: a gay Asian.

Gestappo's : those who oppose the dirty army

Gills: side fat; love-handles

Grave Diggaz: dirty nails

Grazer: chick that likes to eat a lot

Green Bay: cellulite; cottage cheese

Gregalicious: Owns a greg

Greg-Juice: self explanatory

Greg: penis; tummy stick

Helmet Special: retard

Himstitute: tranny prostitute

Hoemerican: an American hoe

Horses (or any reference to a horse, stable, the derby, races or horse names): people with huge teeth and gums that resemble those of a horse

Insurgents: non SGM perpetrator/ enemies of the army

Jack Bauer: a person with a large fore head or a twenty forehead

Jay Leno: got a big chin

Kodiak: body of a bear

Lee push up bra: from the makers of lee press on nails

Long Head Clan: horse division ( horse head)

Lotto Baby: unknown father (a lot-of people hit that)

MAC Forcefield: tons and tons of makeup that looks clown-like

Mad Monkey: extremely drunk & out of control

Mick Jagger's : Big lips

Muffin Top: when a person's side or stomach fat bubbles over their waistband because their pants are too tight, forming the shape of a muffin

Multichin: multiple chins

Multi-Gregging: Gang bang on one chick

Nominee: person with no money

Nomo's: a place where no homo's are welcome

Noodles: referring to Asian people or descent

Nostrildahmus: Huge nose pipes

Onion: nice a$$

Oscar Myer: Got a Greg

Pack of franks: fat rolls on a chicks body..."Damn! look at the pack of franks on that chic"

Paki house/hut: liquor store

Patch Adams: balding

Pearl catcher: chicks who get c*mmed on

Pebbles: an attractive, yet underage and overly sexual young girl. (aka jailbait)

Pepperidge Farm: way too old

PGM ("Pinky Gang Mafia"): the rival gang of SGM whose members show their pinky finger when having a picture taken

Pickle Smoocher: rubs the Greg

Pig Fishing: guys who are out to just f*ck anything

Pirate: gay dude. Because they like semen on their poop deck

Poon lagoon: pu**y

Prop 8: gay person who wants to get married

Prosthetic Playa: fake wanna be player

Puffydumbbell: roid user

Purple Crayon: A black man's Gregr

Raisinets: ugly nipples

Red Cup Nation: those of us who agree that only red plastic cups should be used at parties (because all other colors are stupid)

Refund Gap: the huge gap between some women's fake boobs that is so big that they should get their money back from their doctor

Ronald Mcdonalds: High arching eyebrows

RVM: red vest mafia: Valet attendant

Sevenhead: means "Yes I ride the Short Bus!"

Sewerfront: Waterfront in Scottsdale

SGM ("Scissor Gang Mafia"): people who make a scissor/backward peace sign when having their picture taken

She-Boys: Trannys

Shim: a girl who looks like a man

Shimspital: hospital for shims

Shman: female type of man

Shopping Bags: droopy boob job or +2'S

Shotgun: a slutty chick. One cock and she's ready to blow

Shougar: a girl that is a cougar and a shim

Skankaholic: addicted to or being a skank; likes skanky chicks; an alcoholic skank

Ski Jumper: big or long nose

Slant F*cker: guy who only likes f*ckin asian chicks

Slim Slow Diet: a fat person who feels it necessary to show people her body..."Sick, see that fat girl in the bikini? Oh, she is feeling good about herself since she just got on the Slim Slow Diet."

Sloon: a chick that looks like she's mixed with snake lizard and baboon

Slug: Ugly slut

Snicker Licker: White girls who only like black guys

Soldier: a member of the Dirty Army; a fan/supporter of thedirty.com

Sorostitute: a girl in a sorority that is easier than a prostitute

Sphere Job: a boob job

Spongebob: a nasty female that has a crabby patty instead of a vagina

A Stallone: a really ugly Italian chick (or any chick for that matter)

Stay Puff: juice-muscular guy obviously on roids

Stretch Armstrong: face lift too tight

Sugar butt: a gay guy

Summer Teeth: some are here, some are there

Superhighway Gap: boobs miles apart

Synchronized Sucking : what aqua f*gs do

Talons: ugly toes

Tenderfoot: gay or feminine

Thunderstorm: extremely large thighs; thunder thighs

Too Fat Shakur:2-pac fat reference

Top Romin : a person that is broke

Tranimal: animal tranny

Tranny: a girl with so much makeup caked on her face that she looks like a transvestite

Tri-Tip: she can try the tip

Troff Feeder: an obese female

Trout: an older man who dates younger women in trying to be younger or "swim upstream"

Trout Mouth: looks like a fish

Tuna Factory: chick who has nasty lookin p*ssy lips..."That chicks gotta tuna factory goin on down there."

Unbeweavable: lots of weave

WNBA: a tall female who is manly

Would You?: means "would you screw this chick?"