07.09.09

NOLA Barbie’s Pack Of Crayons

nola8984

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, so barbie got a new promotion at work.. this was from her “surprise party” for it.. so nik how many guys you think she slept with to get the promotion?? and yes she does like the purple crayon.

I bet far left only got to watch, for safety concerns.- nik

 


Nik Richie

06.24.09

Hottest In NOLA?

NEW ORLEANS HOTTEST???

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, it is time for more of New Orleans’ “Social Butterflies” (so they think) to be put on blast. They claim that they are the hottest girls in Nola and everyone wants to be like them.

Roll call:  Left bottom is fat, Center bottom is long in the face, Right bottom has Popeye arms, Top left has fat chipmunk cheeks, Center top is artificial intelligence and Right top has a witch chin.- nik


Nik Richie

06.18.09

Woman Attacked With Sausage At IHOP

ihopdirty

THE DIRTY ARMY: (thetowntalk.com) - Alexandria Police charged Jose Morales, 42, of 227 Mary Hill Road, Pineville, with second-degree battery for allegedly hitting a co-worker in the face with a hot sausage Sunday morning.

Police reported being called to the International House of Pancakes, 2715 MacArthur Drive, at 10:30 a.m. where they found the victim with a large burn on the right side of her face that was starting to blister. According to the police report, the victim said she was not immediately aware that she had been hit in the face by “a hot, greasy sausage.”

Another employee alleged that she saw Morales throw the sausage at the victim as she was standing on the other side of a high counter from him, according to the police report.

Since when has throwing your meat around against the law?- nik


Nik Richie

06.09.09

Lil Wayne’s Biggest Fan?

tatsmain

THE DIRTY ARMY: NIK, I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT TO SAY, IM SPEECHLESS! LIKE WHY WOULD YOU EVER DO THAT TO YOUR FACE! HOW IS HE EVER GOING TO MAKE A LIFE FOR HIMSELF LOOKING LIKE THAT?? WOAHHH.

There is no such thing as life in prison.- nik


Nik Richie

05.08.09

Hottest Chick At LSU

main7

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this girl Ali is by far the hottest girl at LSU. Even if you say you wouldn’t…we all know you would.

Answer:  No, I wouldn’t and I think she needs to be a DIRTY CELEB… I think her name should be “Optical Illusion” or O-ill for short because she is all face.  Her rack is real and they probably hit the floor swiffer style.  Sorry, but I cannot sacrifice my Greg for this chick.

**DIRTY ARMY, feel free to send more picture of O-ill.


Nik Richie

05.01.09

J.P. Convict

J.P. Convict

THE DIRTY ARMY: This is Mr. Glynn. He got out of jail not that long ago. I bet he was a punk up in there. He thinks he looks so good, and stays checking out guys, but claims it’s a joke. Yeah right. If he thinks he looks so good why is every bitch he dates either a hoe or fuc*in ugly? He claims to rep Kenner City, please! Just because you live in Kenner doesn’t mean you need to rep it. He thinks he has so many friends. All him and his friends do is talk sh*t about each other and mess with each other girls. He is so lame, he talks about everyone behind their back and then denies it because he knows he would get his ass whooped. He is always claiming to be so hard and like he’s about whatever, but when it comes down to it he’s not.

That’s what happens once you have touched another man’s Greg.- nik


Nik Richie

04.30.09

U.G.L.Y.

U.G.L.Y.

THE DIRTY ARMY: NIK,THIS GIRL THINKS SHES THE HOTTEST SH*T AROUND, AND THAT SHE CAN HATE ON EVERYONE ELSE..WHEN THE TRUTH IS THAT SHE IS IDENTICAL WITH A RAT?

Is she on drugs?- nik


Nik Richie

04.29.09

Keeps It In The Family

Keeps it in the family

THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey NIK, this is mayda.(the h*e on the right) Let me tell you about this h*e. She got kicked out of her house and moved in with her boyfriend and while her boyfriend was away she was f*ckin his brother and got pregnant by him. Disappeared and came back to f*ck with every guy she can get her hands on and still f*cks with her baby’s daddy. So all you guys be aware you don’t want to catch something from this h*e. Now NIK, I ask you would you?

Answer: No, not for all of the money in the world.


Nik Richie

04.29.09

Alley Quieff

Alley Quieff

THE DIRTY ARMY: dis iz alley aka the quieffa… be aware boyz she luvz to pee on boiz lapz nd she f*ckz guyz so dey wnt leave her nd she dumb nd fckin fugly i herd she a lil bushy down der to. nik, she belongz wit da apes nd she thnkz her sh*t dnt stink she thnkz she the coolest persn eva to.

Here is a perfect example why America needs to reform education.- nik


Nik Richie

04.28.09

Killer Kelly

KILLER kelly

THE DIRTY ARMY: This is KILLER kelly. everyone help me out here and tell me what you really think of this one.

How tall is that dude, like 5 foot?- nik


Nik Richie


 

 

 

 

 
 

 

 

 

 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 

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+2 Factor: when a chick gets a boob job it increases her value two points on a ten point scale

+2's: fake boobs

30k Milli: a guy who claims he make millions, but really only make around $30k a year and spends all his money on stuff he can't afford; a poser

6 head (5 head): when a person has a enormous forehead (measured in inches)

Affliction: a brand of clothing worn by losers

Afro-Brow: hairy eyebrows

Air biscuit: fart

Anti-petite: no way near small

Aquaf*gs: underwater f*gs

Babushka: a big giant, Harlem Globetrotter-like afro, that explodes out of the panties of a Crabby Patty when panty security has been breached

Beak: Nose like a large bird

Beat: disgustingly ugly

Bissues: b*tch with issues

Blanimal: A black animal

Blast (putting someone on blast): putting someone in the spotlight and/or exposing them; talking crap about someone

Bucket Seats: nice ass

Butterface: everything looks good, but her face

Cadirack: not easy on the eyes, an eye sore

Caker: chick who wears way too much makeup

Cannibal: a lesbian. Because they eat their own kind

Car-Tastrophe: beat looking people in a car

Ceptor head: looks good except her head

Cheesecake: real fruity guy

Chubble: problems fat people cause.

Combustible Cougar: horny for young men

Combustible face: Hazardous look

Cougar in Training (Baby Cougar): a girl who will grow up to be a Cougar because her mom is one and/or she is starting to look and act like one

Cougars: women who are 40 or older who try to be 20 (by getting plastic surgery, wearing tons of makeup, dressing like they are 20, etc) and usually date or "prey" on younger men

Cougar-Troll: an ugly cougar

Cougarville: place where cougars come from

Cougarwood: place where famous cougars go

Cougrrrr: Very ugly cougar

Count gutula: big stomach

Crabby Patty: p*ssy

Crash test dummy: a dumb friend that you can convince to do anything

Dale Boy (Dales): a guy who claims to be straight but acts like he's gay (or really is just gay)

D-Bagalicious: sensational D-bag

D-Bag: Douche bag; someone who sucks at life; a total jerk

Dirty Army: the group of people who are fans of thedirty.com

Dirty Bird: dirty/sl*tty British chick

Don: a young female gold digger looking for a new wealthy father or sugar daddy

Douchetard: douche + retard

Drag Hag: someone who hangs with drag queens

DSL's: D*ck sucking lips

Dugout Driller: aggressive gay guy

Egg Roll(s): fat Asians

F*gadocious: super gay

F*gtastic: overly gay

F*gtician: professional f*gs

Fake SGM: people who are not in the Scissor Gang Mafia but pretend to be by giving the scissor gang sign in pictures (and NIk will point out the reason why they are not cool enough to be in it)

Fanny Pack's : beat girls that have no appeal

Farm: a person's ass

Fattastrophe: group of very fat people

Fifty cake mistake: big girl who loves cake

Fifty Yarder: only looks good from fifty yards away

File You Away: putting a hot guy/girl (whatever works for ya) in your mental hard drive so you can masturbate to them later

Flesbian: Fake lesbian

Forgy: Short for, "For the gays"

Frat Rat: a girl who loves to hang out with and/or screw guys in fraternities

Freetard: a free retard

Front Grill: teeth

F*ck Trophy: baby/kid..."What bout that chick you met at the club the other night, did you hit that?" "Naw she's got a f*ck trophy."

Fugly: f*cking ugly

FUPA: a fat upper pu**y area. Men can have it too.

Gaysian: a gay Asian.

Gestappo's : those who oppose the dirty army

Gills: side fat; love-handles

Grave Diggaz: dirty nails

Grazer: chick that likes to eat a lot

Green Bay: cellulite; cottage cheese

Gregalicious: Owns a greg

Greg-Juice: self explanatory

Greg: penis; tummy stick

Helmet Special: retard

Himstitute: tranny prostitute

Hoemerican: an American hoe

Horses (or any reference to a horse, stable, the derby, races or horse names): people with huge teeth and gums that resemble those of a horse

Insurgents: non SGM perpetrator/ enemies of the army

Jack Bauer: a person with a large fore head or a twenty forehead

Jay Leno: got a big chin

Kodiak: body of a bear

Lee push up bra: from the makers of lee press on nails

Long Head Clan: horse division ( horse head)

Lotto Baby: unknown father (a lot-of people hit that)

MAC Forcefield: tons and tons of makeup that looks clown-like

Mad Monkey: extremely drunk & out of control

Mick Jagger's : Big lips

Muffin Top: when a person's side or stomach fat bubbles over their waistband because their pants are too tight, forming the shape of a muffin

Multichin: multiple chins

Multi-Gregging: Gang bang on one chick

Nominee: person with no money

Nomo's: a place where no homo's are welcome

Noodles: referring to Asian people or descent

Nostrildahmus: Huge nose pipes

Onion: nice a$$

Oscar Myer: Got a Greg

Pack of franks: fat rolls on a chicks body..."Damn! look at the pack of franks on that chic"

Paki house/hut: liquor store

Patch Adams: balding

Pearl catcher: chicks who get c*mmed on

Pebbles: an attractive, yet underage and overly sexual young girl. (aka jailbait)

Pepperidge Farm: way too old

PGM ("Pinky Gang Mafia"): the rival gang of SGM whose members show their pinky finger when having a picture taken

Pickle Smoocher: rubs the Greg

Pig Fishing: guys who are out to just f*ck anything

Pirate: gay dude. Because they like semen on their poop deck

Poon lagoon: pu**y

Prop 8: gay person who wants to get married

Prosthetic Playa: fake wanna be player

Puffydumbbell: roid user

Purple Crayon: A black man's Gregr

Raisinets: ugly nipples

Red Cup Nation: those of us who agree that only red plastic cups should be used at parties (because all other colors are stupid)

Refund Gap: the huge gap between some women's fake boobs that is so big that they should get their money back from their doctor

Ronald Mcdonalds: High arching eyebrows

RVM: red vest mafia: Valet attendant

Sevenhead: means "Yes I ride the Short Bus!"

Sewerfront: Waterfront in Scottsdale

SGM ("Scissor Gang Mafia"): people who make a scissor/backward peace sign when having their picture taken

She-Boys: Trannys

Shim: a girl who looks like a man

Shimspital: hospital for shims

Shman: female type of man

Shopping Bags: droopy boob job or +2'S

Shotgun: a slutty chick. One cock and she's ready to blow

Shougar: a girl that is a cougar and a shim

Skankaholic: addicted to or being a skank; likes skanky chicks; an alcoholic skank

Ski Jumper: big or long nose

Slant F*cker: guy who only likes f*ckin asian chicks

Slim Slow Diet: a fat person who feels it necessary to show people her body..."Sick, see that fat girl in the bikini? Oh, she is feeling good about herself since she just got on the Slim Slow Diet."

Sloon: a chick that looks like she's mixed with snake lizard and baboon

Slug: Ugly slut

Snicker Licker: White girls who only like black guys

Soldier: a member of the Dirty Army; a fan/supporter of thedirty.com

Sorostitute: a girl in a sorority that is easier than a prostitute

Sphere Job: a boob job

Spongebob: a nasty female that has a crabby patty instead of a vagina

A Stallone: a really ugly Italian chick (or any chick for that matter)

Stay Puff: juice-muscular guy obviously on roids

Stretch Armstrong: face lift too tight

Sugar butt: a gay guy

Summer Teeth: some are here, some are there

Superhighway Gap: boobs miles apart

Synchronized Sucking : what aqua f*gs do

Talons: ugly toes

Tenderfoot: gay or feminine

Thunderstorm: extremely large thighs; thunder thighs

Too Fat Shakur:2-pac fat reference

Top Romin : a person that is broke

Tranimal: animal tranny

Tranny: a girl with so much makeup caked on her face that she looks like a transvestite

Tri-Tip: she can try the tip

Troff Feeder: an obese female

Trout: an older man who dates younger women in trying to be younger or "swim upstream"

Trout Mouth: looks like a fish

Tuna Factory: chick who has nasty lookin p*ssy lips..."That chicks gotta tuna factory goin on down there."

Unbeweavable: lots of weave

WNBA: a tall female who is manly

Would You?: means "would you screw this chick?"