The Dirty

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik this girl has a sewer mouth all the way around!! Just look at those crusty yellow teeth!! She needs to learn to keep her sewer mouth shut and realize that he chose his family over her disgusting cellulite legs and nasty mouth!! She talks so much we joke about her as motormouth!! So motormouth, keep your nasty mouth shut and find a new guy but first lose about 50 lbs and brush your teeth!! They have $99 whitening treatments maybe you should look into it….

I’ll be nice and won’t show everyone what I just had to witness.- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik this girl is Elizabeth R** of Lexington Kentucky. This girl attends the University of Kentucky and used to be on their dance team but was kicked off because shes a whale. She is now a member of the Fillies a loser arena football team. These girls are beat and gross. Shes a golddiggin sl*t to the poor guy in the photos who prob now has more stds than he could ever imagine having. She is a bartender at this bar i used to go to and she thinks she owns that place walking around like shes the sh*t. I also have heard recent knowledge that she has an std that she has given to quit a few people who have then given it to others what an epidemic!! shes discusting and this h*e needs to be put on blast! I mean really look at that gut in her so called danceteam picture….more like beat Bi*tches picture. Come on nik seriously would you with this nasty mexican sl*t?

Answer: no.  There is a reason they took the photo from far away.

THE DIRTY ARMY: nik, this is brit and her mom sandy. they are best friends. for her birthday, britnee got her mom TANNING LOTION because she obviously needsd to tan some more. when sandy’s not working, which is all the time because she’s unemployed, she’s constantly commenting on all of britnee’s pictures. clearly, all of her pictures are beautiful and model worthy. especially the one’s with her best friend k8 AKA andy dick. as for britnee, when she’s not taking pictures of herself making a fishy/kiss face she’s out jersey chasing. i think the fishy face is supposed to make her nose look smaller. im not so sure it’s working, brit. do you have any suggestions for them, nik?

The mom should stop sleeping with her daughters friends…and the daughter should not wear that shirt, its disturbing.- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik – Meet D.   D is for Derek. It is also for “douche bag”, “dark year-round” and “damn, get a wardrobe with some f*cking sleeves.” This guy is the poster child for the Banana Boat self-tanner. He likes his teeth too white, his skin too dark and his Ed Hardy t-shirts too tight. Most importantly the dude wears make-up. Seriously. His look is the curious (or bi-curious) amalgamation of guido fashion with guidette eye liner. You’ll know him by his pose, the one where he instinctively points to the camera every time its about to flash as if you don’t fucking know where you are. Its the verbal equivalent of “how you doin?” and Derek has it mastered. And we haven’t even touched the hair. Then again, would we want to even if we could? D should also be for Da Vinci cause this guy is a modern day mane artist. His brush: a $150 Chi Straightener. His paint: a fistful of bedhead gel. His canvas: a head full of hair so overrun with product it is the last safe haven from the UV rays he blasts himself with three times a week. Sorry ladies he’s taken…by two girls. Good news for Derek is that his make-up collection just doubled..

Guys clearly batting for both teams.  I bet he is really self conscious about his flapped ears.- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, The blond um… beauty… in these pictures is Kaitlyn, or better yet “k8lyn” as she prefers to refer to herself. To put things in most literal terms, she is a very snobby bitch who walks around like she owns the world, and everyone is beneath her. She likes to promote the fact that she “has money to spend” yet she can’t afford to downsize or fix that nose?

I have unfortunately been present on numerous occasions where this girl and her beloved sidekick (orange girl also pictured) are around. They are loud, obnoxious, and need to learn to handle their alcohol as well as their obsession for UK basketball players. I think these girls forgot to leave high school behind.

The question is… Would you?

Answer: no, that is a man..you can’t fool me.

THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey Nik~ Our top American tennis player, Andy Roddick hits this chick. So how about it, would ya?

Answer: No, I watched the never ending tennis final last Sunday and wanted to throw up every time they panned to her greasy face.  She looks nothing like these pictures.