Most Beautiful Eyes

THE DIRTY ARMY: I know you got a thing for eyes,, can’t find out who this queen is but wow check the eyes!! what do you think??

Not even close, those heavy lids are putting me to sleep.- nik

Dirty Person All Around

THE DIRTY ARMY: An eye for an eye… Dirt on dirt…

Where’d her chin go?

Is She Worth It

THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey Nik, Look, I’ve been with my girl for 6 years, she wants to marry me and all that stuff, she’s great and all, but she’s a little dull sometimes. She wants to be a vet, likes chick flicks and listens to One Direction… I’d be more willing to get more serious but there’s a girl I CANNOT get out of my head, her name is Holly Brunt, I’ve never talked to her properly before but I see her all the time and she sounds like the fucking bomb. She’s a musician, artist, model… Look man, is this girl worth risking my 6 year relationship? And… Would you?

Answer: No, anyone who cuts their own bangs is a head case.

Nik Would You

THE DIRTY ARMY: nik This is Hannah. I think she is naturally pretty without trying too hard. What do you think?

Answer: No, her eyebrows almost touch her eyelids.

Manchester Sexy Girls

THE DIRTY ARMY: NIk, I am Claudia, Hot and sexy girl from manchester, i will provide you incall and outcall escort service very cheap price.

No.- nik

How Many More Procedures Does Helen Flanagan Need

THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey Nik. I just wanted to submit British soap opera star Helen Flanagan and ask you your opinion. She recently had a nose job and looks practically perfect. Do you think she should get any other work done?

I don’t like her nose job, the doctor raised the tip of her nose too high which brings attention to her chipmunk mouth. Also, she needs a breast lift STAT!- nik

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