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Would You Do Shrek

Would you do Shrek?

THE DIRTY ARMY: This girl’s name is Jessica, she’s about 24-25 and lives on Maui. She literally fcks anything with a dick (doesn’t have to be human!), fucks for favors (in high school she fcked a cart-boy at the grocery store for a ride), and self-induces abortions so she doesn’t have to take responsibility for her shit. She probably has every drd known to man. So I guess the real question is, despite all that, would you? (Most of the guys on Maui have hit it because of her big saggy tits.).

She’s given up on life due to looks…- nik

Sexy Blonde From Maui

THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey Nik, this is Skyler from Maui, what do you think of her +2’s?  She thinks she is the hottest girl in all of the islands, I wanted to ask you what you mainlanders think and Nik, would you with this Hawaiian dime piece?

Answer: Can we first figure out if this is a man or not. His ribcage is deformed and his face looks handsome. More research is needed on this Maui Machine. At this point I will have to pass.

Hide Your Boyfriends



THE DIRTY ARMY: NIK THIS CALI H*E BAG (Alexandra PLuta) CAME TO MAUI AND SLEPT WITH EVERYONES BOYFRIENDS! and now the trog thinks shes some multi platinum singer! SHUT YOUR FACE wannabe h*e.. your artist name is SAMANDRIELLA, last time i checked thats a strippers name…Now the trog says she’s doing shows in japan maybe that explains the new pepsi addiction…you should really try eating sometimes..

Answer: No, she has a dream killer face, one of the worst I’ve seen.

Hawaiian Goddess

Hawaiian Goddess?

Hawaiian Goddess?

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik this is Kirsten Stephenson Pino, absolutely stunning. you can’t say no to this one…Would you?

Answer: No, she’s too thick has a big nose a fish looking mouth and lets not forget these were photoshopped.

The One With The Eyes

would you?

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik the one on the left is lindsey– BRUNETTE with the hottest blue eyes I’ve ever seen. would you?

Answer: no.  Don’t fall for the eyes their dream killers.

Julie, Maui, Hawaii


Julie, Maui, Hawaii

Julie, Maui, Hawaii


THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this hottie is from Canada, i met her in Maui while she was vacationing….would you?

Answer: No, I might Visine her in the eyes just for fun, but that’s about it.

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