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Messed Up Character


THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this is Becc Rain, commonly known for her drama and false accusations against her ex, Justin Parisian. She recently had her newborn taken away from her because “Justin” abused her in front of the baby, but it was the other way around. She has lied many times telling people that she won custody of the baby, and she has her at home safe and sound and Justin is apparently getting arrested for ABUSING her? Sorry hunny, but your kids went too far. You got caught in your own lies, and then went around asking people to write “RIP BECCA RAIN” on your wall..so that your baby daddy would think you committed suicide. I don’t know why so many people think that suic*de is fun, or depression is for attention. Don’t pretend to do that sh*t Also, you claimed to be 4 weeks pregnant 2 weeks after Justin left you for good, and you already knew it was a boy, and had a “double miscarriage” your timing and lies don’t make sense. You’re a total flousy. All you want to do is get drunk and “turn up” all I see and hear is that you’re drunk, you don’t even deserve to have custody of your child. Grow up and take responsibility. You’re not a kid anymore, you’re a grown ass woman with responisbilites. Your biggest priority should be your daughter…not who wanna turn up… Also, have some class, you dress like a 5 year old. And no one wants to see you sitting on your dresser making your ads look bigger. ··· annonn.

Bum in the Club


THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this little slore here is Margaret-Marie. She loves to club…not bad but sure she looks all innocent and sh*t but nooo. She bums smokes all the time from people; Every time I see her she can’t stop to talk for 5 minutes because she’s headed to the f’ing club. She’s going because if she dresses all slutty, guy will buy her drinks…and she repays them with a good ol’ f’! First of all who would touch that lmao. She posts the sluttiest pics ever! And beware men, so far she seems like n easy f’ but she’s full of drds I swear !  Easy lay but there’s a risk. She’s a cheating slore who will f’ you, than your “bestfriend” you’ll catch her on Rideau street or Taquila jacks …or on your friends dick..stupid bumming broke ass slut !

David Perverted Truck Driver


THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, allow me to introduce you to dirty David Guindon, Ottawas dirtiest perverted tow truck driver. This real piece of work likes to take advantage of girls with broken down vehicles by wanting blow jobs for cheaper tow prices, steals out of the cars when they are impounded and cheats on his girlfriend in these impound lots. Poor girl has no clue he’s even doing this. I understand it can be a hard job but it’s no excuse to skip showers and have the most horrible body odour ever. He towed my moms car last week and I made her take an inventory of everything in the car and when he found that out he flipped, probably because he knew he couldn’t steal anything. Dirty Dave, the pepsi addicted thief of a tow truck driver. Probably better off just leaving your car on the side of the road then let this loser help you.

My Old Whip


THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, selling my old ride. 1980 model. Exterior rusty and hairy. Interior flogged out (details below). Very noisy unit. Rare 80 model with deflated dual air bags. Has been rear ended far too many times and is full of bog. It has very little grunt and has a top end whining noise when you drive it hard, very temperamental thing. Running gear is worn, Box BADLY needs an overhaul, been flogged by too many drivers with no oil in it. Has been bored out beyond it’s limits, 15 years of piston slap has taken it’s toll on it too, can dangle two oversized pistons in one chamber and still have room to flip a coin. Very filthy, stinks like cat piss on a dog sh*t. I’d put covers on if you intend on driving it ANYWHERE, pisses out leaks everywhere when warmed up and foams at the head. AS IS, WHERE IS, NO WARRANTY, NO RETURNS AND NO REFUNDS! Make an offer or swap for a , (I don’t even give a f if it’s a 4 pack of vodka cruisers. (Might be a fixer-upper for a VERY patient and wealthy buyer

Emily Vendetteis Obsessed


THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this girl loves telling people she’s had ch***ia several times, but its okay because its common she says. She is OBSESSED with her ex from like grade 10. She knows she only has a few friends because she slept with everyones boyfriend. She loves getting paid for BJ’s at clubs. she wants to be a cop but freaks when people say its hard to be a cop when you always do cocaine and MDMA. she’s the cheapest person to walk this earth and dresses like she doesn’t have a home. loves telling people guys will go down even if she hasn’t showered in a week. she is so comfortable with bullying her friends to stand up for her and hangout with her even though she talks shit about them all. She doesn’t brush her hair ever and it looks like willy wonka is living in that sh*t.

Cowboy Gangster


THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this is Ottawa’s cowboy gangster. He rides all the youngest, infects anyone he can with drds and all from the comfort of his mom’s couch. He also claims to be the leader of the notorious west side and kids fear him across the city. Of course as hard as he is his mom and dad still drive him from place to place our give him bus tickets and change to call home….. He is one Ottawa boy you never ever want to cross onto his bad side.

Questionably forgy.- nik

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