THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey Nik, I was just wondering what you think of this girl?  She is an 18 year old girl, her parents are Iranian, but she lives in Norway… a lot of people over here think that she is super hot, and a lot of girls have stolen her pics to make fake FB/twitter/IG profiles. Personally I think her nose needs some shrinkage… but what do YOU think Nik?

I think it should be mandatory for all Iranian women to get nose jobs.- nik

Ok Pool Season has officially begun. I will be in Las Vegas Friday June 7 to give my blessing to the hottest new pool club in Vegas… come join me as I host DAYLIGHT!! Free Peach Ciroc on me.- nik

**Daylight Beach Club is the 50,000 square-foot Ultra Pool/Dayclub with a total capacity of about 5,000 people. It includes a huge stage with six LED screens where Light Las Vegas resident DJs will play. Daylight has 70 daybeds, 23 cabanas and two bungalows, signature cocktails, cuisine including sushi and sashimi.**

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, look what Nickel posted on her instagram. Why is Tricia Evans blaming you for murdering b*tches?

Actually Tricia has a point… maybe I should tell fat chicks to jump off a bridge!- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, did you see what the hell happened in London town?  These 2 muslims killed a soldier in the middle of the street by cutting his head off with a meat cleaver and then went to go talk about it.  Crazy people out there.

Brutal… but doesn’t really sound like a terrorist attack.- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik how has nobody submitted this yet??? Rob Ford, the mayor of Toronto was caught smoking cr*ck by none other then the drug dealers he was doing it with.  The Star has already seen the video and confirmed has was smoking on a crack pipe.  Ford’s lawyers statement doesn’t deny the fact of smoking but denies knowing for sure whats in the pipe… this guy is embarrassing everyone who lives in Toronto, the pig needs to go, he’s been skating a fine line for far to long.  Don’t you agree nik? [Click here for story: Toronto Star]

People in Canada make no sense to me… why would you vote for this guy?- nik

THE DIRTY ARMY: Hey Nik, this is Ashley. She is a Hooters girl (at like 26) and still seems to have all the money in the world. She is ALWAYS out at clubs, practically 6 nights a week. She has had more work done than anyone I know, and she has no shame in admitting it. She is so self obsessed, she uploads a ton of selfies to instagram on a daily basis, and is constantly having people take pictures of her when she is out. Even though she works at Hooters, she drives a really nice car, and always wears Gucci, Prada, LV, Fendi, Red Bottoms, you name it. Personally, I think she is a sugar baby. She’s done some “modeling” for Playboy Golf, now she thinks she is God’s gift to the world. This girl NEEDS to be a dirty celeb.

I like her armpits.- nik