THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, meet Eleanor Calder. 20 year old Uni student from Manchester. Now I know she may a bit young for your liking but this isn’t just any typical school girl. She’s dating a member of one of the hottest boy bands around right now. Only, she’s not really dating him. She’s actually a beard to cover up for the members actual gay profile. Believe it or not, this girl has over a million twitter followers, wanting to look like her, to have a thigh gap like hers, and just to simply BE her. Could you do me a favor and show all of those bitches that there is nothing to admire about this b*tch?

This sounds like Lance Bass relived.- nik