THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, as a die hard member of the dirty army I must say I’m completely disappointed that you of all people would hide this from us. Scooby and Sara Leal (Ashton Kutcher’s lifesaver) are going steady. I saw them holding hands last night in PB and my mouth dropped. Scooby please be careful. She is obviously not with you because of your looks, she is with you because you are famous like Ashton!

I promised Scooby that his love life is off limits.- nik