Fashion

PFW: Louis Vuitton – So Forgettable, I Want To Forget

I’ve been waiting for this. Louis Vuitton at Paris Fashion week.

First, can I say Jaden Smith had the worst seat possible. He probably has no idea but they always give A1 to the irrelevant in the room. It’s a backhanded compliment. The fact that he doesn’t know this blows my mind. He should have left in disgust.

Second, the common sell was LV belts. None of the clothing matched. The high boots were cool, but the black dresses were not even slimming. There’s a reason why none of the celebrities showed emotion. They all were waiting on the next design, hoping it was something memorable. Even the bags sucked.

Third, can I just say how great it is that we don’t have to travel to Paris to watch these shows. I’m putting fashion in your lap. You would have wasted $5,378 on this trip. You’re welcome.

Grade: D+

https://thedirty.com/?p=2184726

PFW: Stella McCartney – Understands The Office Environment

Thank you Stella McCartney for saving me from the Chanel disaster at Paris Fashion Week.

Finally some understands the work place. Not only do these women look like deal closers, the short cut on the business skirts are a key to success. If you can distract an opponent, you can win the game. These skirts are cut at the perfect length and the long sleeve element gives the one suits a touch of class.

I can live without the horse prints.

Grade: B+

https://thedirty.com/?p=2184543

PFW: Chanel – Don’t Mind The Rocket Ship At Paris Fashion Week

I’m not sure if this is a tribute to the movie Hidden Figures, but the NASA theme is just dumb. Nobody wants to go to Chanel and have to sit 100 yards away from the inspiration that is Karl Otto Lagerfeld.

I want to say I love the colors, but honestly the smog and crossing catwalk ruined my life. I guess the space boots these women are wearing are somewhat cool. Even though they look like UGGs from 2014.

Grade: C-

https://thedirty.com/?p=2184545

PFW: Valentino – Bring Christmas Sweaters Back Into Fashion

What are these patterns? Nobody wants to see a woman from Woodstock.

By far my least favorite from Paris Fashion Week. For some reason Valentino thinks the future of fashion is covering the neck. This is wrong. When I look at a woman, her neck line is 72% of her total outcome. A longer neck makes for better posture, a shorter neck tells me a woman is masculine with definitive shoulders.

Why would Valentino want to force a woman’s hand? I’m not happy about this line.

https://thedirty.com/?p=2184235

PFW: Christian Dior – Winning Paris Fashion Week

There’s a reason why all the real celebs sit at Christian Dior over the other designers. Watch this video ladies. I’ve been telling you my whole life to wear dark clothing for slimming purposes.

Christian Dior had amazing lighting which popped the wardrobe while still putting a mark on the dark elements of the designs. The black mesh skirts were phenomenal. Every outfit was sliming but had a wavy flow.

My only complaint would be the whites … they weren’t necessary.

https://thedirty.com/?p=2184234
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