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THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, I went to high school with this loser who has $19 in his bank account (saw his bank statement) and doesn’t have enough money to support his drug habit. Austin Swindell said he’d suck Greg for pepsi to a fellow friend. In high school Austin Swindell overdosed on drugs 2 days before the state playoffs. Luckily Saguaro has such a sh*tty program with no ethics and decided to overlook it. This loser should’ve got kicked off the team. Austin Swindell still lives at home with his parents and hangs with cannibal Beau Burton (the Utah football player on the run from cops) and his other loser friend Cory Adams. They all are jobless and college dropout losers. Too bad high school ended. Good luck guys. Thankfully for them, they have welfare to look forward to.

Austin, be a good man and turn in fugitive Beau Burton. At least do something positive with your life instead of living through your last name.- nik